Leslie Knope: All I can tell you Is that all the parks are closed until further notice. [all groan] Look, no one is more upset about this than I am. It's not like it's a competition or anything, 'cause if it was, I would win. But that's neither here nor there. The point is, I would win.
Woman #1: How long will they be closed?
Ron Swanson: Could be forever.
Man: With the government shut down, who's gonna stop Al Qaeda?
Leslie Knope: One thing at a time.
Woman #2: School is out in two weeks. What am I going to do with my kids all day, keep them in my house? Where I live?
Leslie Knope: I don't know what to tell you.
Woman #3: What about the kids concert tomorrow at Ramsett Park? The Freddy Spaghetti concert.
Leslie Knope: Freddy Spaghetti has been canceled. [all groan]