Ron Swanson: "Thank you, Old Gus, for brightening our lives, our hearts, and most importantly, our shoes." [applause]
[aside to camera:]
Leslie Knope: This truly is a day of mixed emotions for me. I'm sad that Old Gus is leaving, but it allows me to help Andy restart his life as Pioneer Hall's new shoeshine guy.
[back:]
Gus: Well, I've been listening to your boring speeches for the last 50 years, and now it's time for you to listen to one of mine. [laughter] You know, a day like this makes a man reflect upon his life, and I've come to the conclusion that I've completely wasted mine. [light laughter] And just for the record, I never ever liked being called "Old Gus." I didn't understand it when I was in my 20s, and I sure hate it now. So go to hell, every single one of you. Screw Pawnee, and screw your damn shoes. Ah!
Andy: [laughs] Oh, God. That's classic.