‘The Cubicle’
Season 6, Episode 12 - Aired January 10, 2017
Jess offers to pay Robby's medical bills. Nick is nervous after Reagan is talked into reading his book. Meanwhile, Cece starts work on her modeling agency.
Quote from Robby
Robby: I'm not gonna sue you, Jess. Was that not clear? I told my lawyer that you're just an innocent bystander. Okay? So, if we can, uh, hit the mall? I mean, there is a big sale at this Japanese cereal store. It sounds amazing.
Jess: You really think I was an innocent bystander, do you?
Robby: Is that bad?
Jess: Yeah.
Robby: I'm just saying that I don't really think that you, uh, ever do anything wrong.
Jess: Anything? Ever?
Robby: Oh, we're starting to get into this. Look... I know a great place where we can hash this over. It's a place called Hash It Over. It's in the food court at the mall, it's a hash brown...
Jess: We're not going to the mall.
Quote from Nick
Jess: Well, I think that's good you're letting yourself be vulnerable.
Nick: Was I not that with you?
Jess: Who knows what happened with us? We were just kids. Like... you had a box, and I wanted you to get a bank account.
Nick: Well, they're kind of the same thing.
Jess: Well...
Nick: You wanted to live on a lake; I wanted to live on Mars.
Jess: You wanted to be a truck driver on Mars, which is impractical.
Nick: Well, I need to work. I need to work.
Quote from Nick
Nick: I'm taking the gin with me, though. Alcohol is kind of a cubicle for the insides.
Jess: Nick, you're like a... drunk Maya Angelou.
Nick: Not the first time I heard that.
Quote from Nick
Reagan: I, uh...
Nick: Fell asleep on my book. It's okay. Agatha Christie's husband, David... notoriously hated her writing. Hated it. But they had other things, you know? They had surfing, dogs... they... they rescued a lot of dogs... had electric sex...
Reagan: I'm afraid I'm not gonna like your book.
Nick: Thank you for stopping me... I don't even know what I was talking about. I don't know anything about Agatha Christie.
Quote from Winston
Jess: To Cece, for booking her first client's first modeling gig.
All: Cheers.
Winston: And to Winston for making Donovan the face of LAPD's recruitment campaign. I just hope he doesn't look better in blue than I do. Wink.
Cece: Oh, he definitely will. He's a model.
Quote from Winston
Jess: Who else has a gift?
Winston: Whoo! Bull button. You press that, guaranteed crowd pleaser. [Cece presses button]
Male Voice: Bull!
Quote from Nick
Nick: I got something better. Noise-canceling headphones.
Cece: Thank you. Wow.
Reagan: Yeah, are those mine?
Nick: Yes.
Reagan: They're broken.
Nick: Oh, nothing is ever truly broken.
Quote from Winston
Jess: All right, well, I got you a filing cabinet to file all the headshots of your clients.
Winston: FYI, Ferguson's in one of those drawers making fluffies. "Fluffies" is cat farts. [Winston presses the button] Bull!
Quote from Winston
Nick: Ow, Winston, straighten your arms when you eat.
Winston: You don't think I want to? Ain't no room, fam.
Nick: Straighten your arms, fam.
Winston: Then how am I gonna reach my food?
Nick: Oh.
Quote from Schmidt
Reagan: Why don't you just use a real gator?
Nick: What?
Schmidt: Gator is Pepperwood's best friend... and clairvoyant brother.
Reagan: Mm. Oh, my bad. Sorry, I haven't read it yet.
Cece: What?
Schmidt: What?
Nick: Doesn't matter.
Winston: Clear the next 24 hours.
Schmidt: You haven't read it?
Nick: It's really not that big of a deal. I also don't have an extra hard copy so let's just talk about something else.
Schmidt: Ooh, you can take mine. I've highlighted the more sexual parts. I'm not ashamed.