Jess Quote #791
Jess: Sir. You seem like a reasonable person.
Barry: I'm not and you're at 18 and 19.
Jess: Okay. [Barry blows a raspberry] You know what? You want mean, I'll give you mean. I hope your mom falls down the stairs and she hurts parts of herself.
Barry: I hate my mom. Back to 16 and 17.
Jess: Thank you.
Barry: Don't thank me. 18, 19.
Jess: It's Christmas.
Barry: Oh, I didn't know that. I thought they just did a black version of Annie for no reason. 20, 21.
Jess: You...
Barry: 22, 23.
Jess: But...
Barry: 24, 25.
Jess: Sir.
Barry: They're on the wing, dear. Next?
New Girl Quotes
‘LAXMas’ Quotes
Quote from Schmidt
Schmidt: You know what they call you where I'm from? A dirty old bitch. Dirty old "biatch." "Biatch," just in general. 'Cause I ain't from Manhattan, sir. I'm from Long Island. 5-1-6, up in your lounge, sucka.
Robert: You better calm down, or you're gonna be kicked out of the...
Schmidt: Good, I don't want to be in this lounge. I don't want to be in any club that you're a part of.
Cece: Okay, am I missing something?
Schmidt: I don't want to be in any lounge or club that you're a part of, sir. You dirty old bitch, for good measure. 'Cause I'm from Long Island, I'll take the railroad... LIRR.
Robert: You're embarrassing yourself.
Schmidt: New York, Long Island. Billy Joel. Cece, let's roll.
Cece: Okay.
Schmidt: [grabs champagne glass] Nassau County. Billy Joel, one more time. "Piano Man." "Goodnight Saigon." That's a sad one. Cry about that, you dirty old bitch.
Quote from Winston
Nick: You better learn how to ride a polo horse.
Winston: It's actually a polio horse. Uh, originally they were bred as helper horses for people with polio, but I don't think anything of what I just said was correct, so...
Quote from Nick
Nick: Why we should've taken trains. The sky's too fickle. It's the play place for butterflies.