Coach Quote #90

Quote from Coach in Julie Berkman's Older Sister

Schmidt: So, uh, why don't you tell me what you think about that sponge there, Coach. I mean... [clears throat] Ernie. I don't know why I would call you Coach.
Coach: Okay. Um... Well, I love sponges because they connect my heart to my hand.
Schmidt: Wow, thank you so much for that.
Coach: I wish my buddies could see me now.
Schmidt: What?
Coach: They'd be all like, "Hey, man, let me get a hit of that squishy whip."
Schmidt: Right on. Way to, uh, add your own take. Uh, to... to your... to your own take.

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 ‘Julie Berkman's Older Sister’ Quotes

Quote from Schmidt

Schmidt: No, I'm not happy. I'm poor, and I'm living in a filthy thimble. I've gone from riches to rags. It's reverse Annie.
Nick: Oh, spoiler alert. Now you just ruined Annie.

Quote from Schmidt

Nick: Don't worry, don't worry. I got it. I got it. I'll just clean it.
Coach: Dude, there's a sponge in your hand.
Schmidt: No, let him go. He's my inspiration. You know, living with him in that slovenly hellhole has been a secret blessing. It's made me stronger. Without ash to rise from, the phoenix would just be a bird getting up. I am a phoenix, and I will rise.
Cece: He usually says that speech before sex.
Schmidt: By 2015, I will have my own room. And by 2016... [looks off into the distance]
Coach: What is he looking at?
Nick: I don't know.
Schmidt: ...I will be a millionaire.

Quote from Nick

Nick: Give him the account. He's a hard worker, and he's a neat freak. How do I know that? 'Cause I share a room with him.
Gina: You two share a room?
Nick: And you should see his side. It is so clean. It looks like the inside of a Japanese subway. Speaking of sharing a bedroom, Brittany's coming over tonight. Uh, so I'm gonna need ten to 15 minutes of privacy for... I don't need 15 minutes. That's excessive. Give me five to ten. That feels braggy. Give me three to five, but no less than three 'cause that's rude to girls.