[flashback:]
Schmidt: Have you always been short? I've always been fat. But who cares how God made you? Don't let him put you in a skin box. At the end of the day, I'm just a fat guy standing here in front of a short guy telling him that I think we found his tree.
[present:]
Schmidt: It wasn't long before I caught the attention of Old Man McCue, Christmas tree king of Syracuse, inventor of triple netting. However... In the words of the late, great Sir Billy Joel.
Jess: Billy Joel is definitely alive. And he's definitely not a knight.
Schmidt: "The good, they do die young."

Winston: And that's when I decided to stop playing the game of basketball. Jess, walk away the moment you stop loving it. I mean, that's what I did.
Jess: That's the thing, you didn't walk away.
Coach: You decided nothing. That story contains zero decisions.
Winston: Look, I decided to stop playing the game of basketball when my doctor told me I had to stop. Okay, okay, all right, I it was my decision to start to play the game of basket.
Jess: You were handed a basketball six seconds after you were born.
Winston: Damn, do I even like basketball? I mean, goodness, have I ever made any decisions my whole life? Are we all just living inside the mind of a giant?

Jess: Oh, my God. I honestly don't know what to do. I have so little time.
Cece: Hey.
Jess: Cece! Have you ever questioned your entire career?
Cece: Duh, I'm a 31 year old model. My last job was for a phone sex ad, and I was the one calling.