Nick Quote #233

Quote from Nick in Models

Nick: Uh, Schmidt, I got you something, man. Uh, they didn't have a Jewish star at the store, so I got you a regular cookie and I made the star myself by breaking off the pieces. It's meant to celebrate your Jewish heritage.
Schmidt: What is this?
Nick: A Jewish star... I just said that.
Winston: Hey, hey, Schmidt, just...
Schmidt: This... Is so terrible!
Nick: You gave me a cookie, I gave you a cookie. You gave me a cookie, gave you cookie. Gave me cookie, got you cookie! You gave me cookie, I got you cookie, man! Gave me cookie, got you cookie! We're even! We're even, Schmidt! I mean, what do you want from me? What do you want, Schmidt? I've been racking my brain all day. I walked around the grocery store, man, for 45 minutes. I didn't know what to get you. And then I was thinking I was gonna get you ramen like we used to eat, but you probably eat, like, fancy ramen now with, like, figs in it. I don't know, man. You love me too much, Schmidt, and you picked the wrong guy. And when are you gonna get that through that giant head of yours? I'm just gonna let you down, man.

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 ‘Models’ Quotes

Quote from Jess

Jess: [sings] Happy birthday, dude!
Cece: Hello.
Jess: I made you a cake.
Cece: Can't. Booked a car show for tomorrow, and I have been so good this week. I lost four pounds.
Jess: Oh, come on, Cece. It's your birthday. We're gonna eat cake, we're gonna watch Clueless on VHS, and we're gonna try to make prom dresses out of towels. Obviously, just like we always do.
[flashback:]
Young Jess: As if! As if is, like, the funniest thing ever.
Young Cece: I wish I had a stepbrother to fall in love with.
Young Jess: I know, right? Paul Rudd.

Quote from Cece

Cece: You and I have never spent my birthday apart, ever. Except for the one time in seventh grade where you walked out of my sleepover because you claimed...
Jess: When you struck me in the breast.
Cece: But I didn't even touch boob, because you know, we all knew you were stuffing...
Jess: Oh, my God. We were all stuffing. Stuffing? We all stuffed.
Cece: You've seen my grandmother. I was not stuffing.
Jess: Yes, we were. It was seventh grade.
Cece: I've been like this since I was seven.

Quote from Jess

Jess: I'm going out tonight with Cece and her model friends, and I'm going for "promising ballerina turned streetwalker."
Schmidt: You have too much joie de vivre. Okay, you want to look a little bit more bored, tired. Just altogether disengaged.
Winston: More tired... more, like, sick-like. Really let your bones prop you up.

 Nick Miller Quotes

Quote from Young Adult

Nick: I'm using magnetic words to break through my writer's block, and it's not working. I've already folded all my shirts and masturbated six times, and I'm running out of things to do. I'm just in a real bind. You see, The Pepperwood Chronicles sold over 30 copies, Jess.
Jess: So, what, we're complaining about good things now?
Nick: It's just, my audience is gonna be clamoring for a sequel, and I can't leave those stevedores, those-those tugboat workers, those lighthouse keepers empty-handed.
Jess: You think that your audience is entirely made of, like...
Nick: Blue-collar nautical workers on the coastline of Maine. I don't think that, Jess, I know that.

Quote from Basketsball

Nick: Hey, where are you guys getting your photos developed these days? I got these beefcake selfies that I want to dangle in front of Jess, get her engine revved up.
Schmidt: Your phone has a camera, Nick.
Nick: These are sexy, sensual, private pics. I don't want them beamed right into Snowden's pocket. I'm not going through Wikileaks, man. It's not for me. Analog. It's the only thing you can trust.
Winston: You care to elaborate, you know, on this whole analog thing?
Nick: No, here's the reality, you never know what's gonna happen with a phone.
Winston: Right.
Nick: The hinges that hold the flip together, they get loosened over time when... when they get wet. And then once you open it, it's easier for people to go in there and see your passwords and, you know, see your codes. Once the screen breaks, your information's in the Twitterverse, man. And it's all out there for everyone to see, all these little monkey elves, man, all these kids. That's all they do. [sputters] Get your information, man. Bottom line is you can't control your technology. That's what's going on in Japan with all those robots. Not for me, man. That's why I trust a hard copy. Plain and simple.

Quote from Goldmine

Nick: When I came out, was it flashy? Was it emotional? Am I mad that Anderson Cooper doesn't fly the flag? Or for what he's doing in his own way-- is it even braver?
Jess: These are all really good questions, but I just can't get my mind off, like, why you dress this way. Why aren't you in better shape?
Nick: Don't put me in a box! There's nothing we gay men hate more than being put in a box.
Jess: Good.
Nick: Look, maybe I'm a bear, maybe I'm a twinkler.
Jess: That's not a category.
Nick: [loudly] I like rugby for the game and for the men. Now, if you excuse me, I got to go do that gay thing I was telling you about, because, of course, I'm gay as hell. [Jess laughs] Bye.
Jess: [whispers] That's not how gay men talk.
Nick: [whispers] I am shattering stereotypes.