Jess Quote #1035
Quote from Jess in Return to Sender
Sam: I'm getting my birthday present at an airport hotel? Oh, my God, are you taking me on a trip to meet my birth mother?
Jess: Oh. No, wait. [laughs] Um, no. Uh, it's, uh... I have a surprise for you, but it's not exactly a present. Um, just wait here.
Sam: Okay.
Jess: Look, I want you to know that no matter what happens, no-no matter how this turns out... and by "this," you'll-you'll see what I'm talking about... I want you to be happy.
Sam: And I want you to be happy. But what did you want me to be before this moment?
Jess: Don't let me get a ticket, okay?
New Girl Quotes
‘Return to Sender’ Quotes
Quote from Nick
Nick: But if it goes poorly, I'm not putting Humpty Dumpty back together again.
Schmidt: Am I Humpty Dumpty?
Nick: Yeah. I'm just not doing it again.
Schmidt: You won't have to.
Nick: Also, nowhere in that rhyme does it say he's an egg.
Schmidt: He's most definitely an egg, Nick.
Nick: So, what kind of king uses all those resources to put together one egg?
Schmidt: It's a parable. Humpty Dumpty is the king.
Nick: Who told you that?
Quote from Nick
Schmidt: Look, I know you don't trust my dad, but I'm happy that he's here. We're working through stuff.
Nick: Wait, Schmidt, I want you to have a relationship with your father. I really do, but I've been down this road so many times. He just shows up out of the boo, and then all of a sudden expects...
Schmidt: It's "blue". It's "blue."
Nick: Well, thanks, Eye-stein.
Quote from Nick
Nick: Hey, Jess, heads up, I borrowed your towel.
Jess: Use your own towel if you're gonna shower.
Nick: No, I didn't shower, I just sponged off.
Jess: Ew. Ugh! That's even worse. You didn't even get clean before you used the towel.
Nick: It's called a French whore's bath.
Jess: You wouldn't make a dime as a French whore.
Cece: You would make zero dollars.
Nick: I'd make millions, millions. Bonjour. Croissant. Millions.