Jess Quote #638
Biology Teacher: Hey. I was looking for you. You weren't in my car. Internet's down.
Jess: Okay, um, well, I rebooted the router. You're actually on the wrong IP address, so... There you go. Ooh. You know I can see everything that you search for, right?
Biology Teacher: I'm a biology teacher. It's all research. [exits]
Coach: Fixing computers and stuff now?
Jess: I'm just taking on a little extra responsibility around here, just getting stuff done that needs doing.
[flashback to Jess on a ride-in lawnmower]
[flashback to Jess painting the corridor:]
Jess: Graffiti's wrong, kids. Don't do it. I love corn on the cob, too, but I'm not gonna paint it all over the walls.
New Girl Quotes
‘Fired Up’ Quotes
Quote from Coach
Coach: I'm what?
Jess: We had to do budget cuts, and we have to let two people go, and you're my friend, and I couldn't stop it. I'm so sorry.
[The boys' basketball team runs in with a custom-made jacket for Coach]
Boy: We all pitched in.
Coach: Thanks, guys. I'm not coach anymore. I'm just Coach.
Quote from Nick
Bill Berklan: So, are you gonna sit, or?
Nick: No, I'm gonna stand. 'Cause isn't that what we are doing? Standing... for the little guy?
Schmidt: [quietly] What is the plan?
Nick: Injustice! [drops screws in Schmidt's hand] I will not stand for it. That is why I will sit right now. I will sit down in this chair... [puts feet on table, falls back] You're negligent! Aah! Get off me! My neck! My neck!
Bill Berklan: Seriously? The fall-down on the chair bit? Is this your first case?
Nick: Yes, it is. And that is why I'll file petition on petition. You're gonna wake up in the morning to paperwork. You're gonna go to bed at night to paperwork. So how about this, gentlemen? You pay the $20,000 settlement to your client yourself, and you'll never see our faces again. What do you call a lunatic who's only got one case and no hobbies? Your worst nightmare.
Quote from Winston
Winston: And the jury will see that there is no justice for the Hebrew man. Not in these so-called United States.
Nick: What is that that you're doing?
Winston: I can't get enough of this legal drama. Check this out. Favorite author, Grisham. Favorite TV show, Judging Amy. Favorite color, courtroom brown. Courtroom Brown. Damn, I wish that was my nickname.
Nick: Did you just think of that? 'Cause it was perfect, man.
Winston: Courtroom Brown.