Jess Quote #492

Quote from Jess in Nerd

Molly: How long were you stuck in that Jacuzzi for?
Jess: I don't really want to talk about it, but, um, at one point, he did grab my foot with his toes like it was a hand.
Rose: What are you doing tonight? 'Cause we got a liquid form of Ecstasy, and we're gonna grade papers together. What?
Jess: I would love to, but I actually think I'm gonna hang out with my old man. [chuckles]

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 ‘Nerd’ Quotes

Quote from Schmidt

Schmidt: With the promotion, uh, I got a new office, so I don't have to look at Bethany's mismanaged eyebrows all day. Do you like it? It's a perfect two-thirds replica of Don Draper's office from Mad Men, and you're my sexy Peggy.
Beth: Good God, at least shut the door.
Schmidt: My tiny credenza is in the way.

Quote from Schmidt

Winston: Hey, you guys know anything about cats? Yeah, I'm trying to score some points with Daisy, so I promised to watch her cat tonight.
Schmidt: They carry disease, they're obsessed with my nipples, and they are unwelcome in this loft.
Cece: Did you just say that cats are obsessed with your nipples?
Schmidt: I've told you this story before.
[flashback to a shirtless Schmidt sleeping in a barn with a cat licking his nipple]
Winston: I think I would have remembered that story.
Schmidt: No cats.

Quote from Nick

Nick: Do you know a place I can get cheap school supplies? I only have $15 and a halfie. $15 and a halfie.
Schmidt: A halfie?
Nick: Yeah, it's a half. It got ripped, so it's a half.
Schmidt: No one's gonna accept that as currency.