Nick Quote #473
Jess: We're just breaking into Foster's backyard, and we are gonna put our butts in his Jacuzzi.
Nick: You're gonna put your butts in his Jacuzzi?
Jess: Isn't it awesome?
Nick: Uh, no, it's not awesome. It's a crime. It's a very stupid crime, but it's a crime.
Jess: Hey, do you have any makeup or costumes that might make someone look like a bush?
Nick: You are about to commit a felony.
Jess: Oh, my God, Nick! You said roll with it!
Nick: You're not the kind of person who could break into the principal's house and get away with it. You're the kind of person who gets caught, and it ends up on the Internet in a funny way.
New Girl Quotes
‘Nerd’ Quotes
Quote from Schmidt
Schmidt: With the promotion, uh, I got a new office, so I don't have to look at Bethany's mismanaged eyebrows all day. Do you like it? It's a perfect two-thirds replica of Don Draper's office from Mad Men, and you're my sexy Peggy.
Beth: Good God, at least shut the door.
Schmidt: My tiny credenza is in the way.
Quote from Schmidt
Winston: Hey, you guys know anything about cats? Yeah, I'm trying to score some points with Daisy, so I promised to watch her cat tonight.
Schmidt: They carry disease, they're obsessed with my nipples, and they are unwelcome in this loft.
Cece: Did you just say that cats are obsessed with your nipples?
Schmidt: I've told you this story before.
[flashback to a shirtless Schmidt sleeping in a barn with a cat licking his nipple]
Winston: I think I would have remembered that story.
Schmidt: No cats.
Quote from Nick
Nick: Do you know a place I can get cheap school supplies? I only have $15 and a halfie. $15 and a halfie.
Schmidt: A halfie?
Nick: Yeah, it's a half. It got ripped, so it's a half.
Schmidt: No one's gonna accept that as currency.