Schmidt: It's cool, man. It's just a little color. In a couple days I'll be brown just like you, Cece. Because... because your culture is...
Cece: What is my culture?
Schmidt: It's, um... you're... Fff... Um... Jjj... Jaflan... Jafanese? Uh, Sa-Saudi... Saudiboo... Um... Monga...
Cece: My parents were born in India.
Schmidt: India... totally. Love India.
Winston: He really does. Hey, Schmidt, why don't you tell her about all the things you love about India.
Schmidt: Uh, sure. I love, you know, uh, I love Slumdog. I love naan, uh, pepper, Ben Kingsley, the stories of Rudyard Kipling. I have respect for cows, of course. I love, uh, the Taj Mahal, Deepak Chopra, anyone named Patel. I love monsoons. I love... I love cobras and baskets, Naveen Andrews. I love mango chutney, uh, really, any type of chutney. Teepees...

Cece: Come on, get up!
Nick: No, I don't dance. I'm from the town in Footloose.

Winston: Are you even wearing underwear? What is between you and that chair?
Schmidt: Just a little bit of sunshine.
Winston: [chuckles] All right, take off that kimono, please.
Schmidt: It's my leisure wear, Winston. Look, I worked 80 hours this week. I just want to come home, put on my 'mono and just hang loose, man. Okay? If you had a job, you'd understand.
Winston: R-Really? Wow! It just got real in here. Okay, you're not gonna take the kimono off? Fine. Then I'm not wearing any pants. Boom! Bam! Mm-hmm. Everybody want to just walk around this house wearing all kinds of stupid stuff, then guess what I'm gonna do, Schmidt. I'm wearing a napkin on my face. Bam! How you like that?
Schmidt: That doesn't even make any sense, Winston.
Winston: It makes perfect sense.
Schmidt: Totally different than me wearing my kimono. You are laughing in the face of thousands of years of samurai culture. And it's an affront, Winston. It's an affront.
Winston: Look at me now, huh? This is the vibe we have in the house now because of you. You want to walk around here looking silly.
Schmidt: This is handcrafted! In China.