Schmidt Quote #36
Winston: You know, I think I was just scared, man. I've been playing basketball my whole entire life. What if I was wasting my time? Maybe I should have been figuring out my life like you.
Schmidt: [laughs] I don't have anything figured out. I'm a fully-grown man with roommates. I have a stupid job. I'm single. My best friend won't even let me see his penis. I mean, my whole life is a sham. Aah!
Winston: I actually feel a lot better. Thanks, Schmidt.
Schmidt: [gasping] Winston, my legs!
Winston: Schmidt?
Schmidt: My legs are seizing up.
Winston: Schmidt!
Schmidt: I hate my life. I hate my... making new discoveries. I'm a fear-based person, apparently. Stop it. Go. I need a... Give me a hug, please. 911. Ow. Ow.
New Girl Quotes
‘Naked’ Quotes
Quote from Schmidt
Schmidt: Hey, look. You've been out of the game for a while. I have three date packages. They work every time. Package A) Close-up magic, dinner, drinks. Package B) Close-up magic, drinks. Package C) Close-up magic.
Quote from Winston
Schmidt: How'd the job interview go?
Winston: You know, terrible.
[flashback:]
Interviewer: Did you see the JWoww retweet and Gaga Twitpic?
Winston: I know Word, and I can open a document... Save it, save as, print, print preview...
[present:]
Winston: She just wanted to chitchat about stuff I've never even heard of.
Quote from Winston
Winston: I've spent the last two years of my life in Latvia. I was playing ball year round. I didn't read the news. I have no idea what happened in America. I've got interviews tomorrow. Fill me in. What'd I miss?
Schmidt: From... from the past two years?
Winston: Give me the highlights. Highlights.
Schmidt: Okay. Uh, country's broke. Betty White's back.
Winston: Oh, cool, cool. What about the rest of the Golden Girls?
Schmidt: All dead, man.
Winston: Damn.