Cece Quote #233
Jess: None of that's girlfriend stuff. That's all good friend stuff.
Cece: Okay, let me, uh, toss out a hypothetical to you, okay? Nick has a piece of lint on his sleeve. Do you go, "Hey, bud, you got some lint on your sleeve"? Or do you pick it off?
Jess: I don't see how that's relevant.
Cece: Yes, you do. Because you are a rabid watcher of The Crown.
Jess: I watch a lot of shows.
Cece: And so therefore, you know... that picking lint off of a man's sleeve... is the most intimate gesture.
Quote from Nick
Nick: And I read that authors should all have a strong look, so I found four authors with strong looks, and I combined them. Tom Wolfe: white suit. Hunter S. Thompson: yellow sunglasses. David Foster Wallace: bandana. Toni Morrison: The Presidential Medal of Freedom.
Quote from Winston
Winston: Well, here's one from deep in the storage unit. Way in the back. I once got my foot stuck in a go-kart. And I had to...
Aly: Hop six laps alongside of it.
Winston: I've been kicked out of multiple focus groups for... for crying too much.
Aly: That happened yesterday, and I was with you.
Winston: I fell asleep in study hall. Had a very loud sex dream.
Aly: That happened to my family member, and I relayed the story to you.
Winston: I fell asleep in a bathtub.
Aly: Knew that.
Winston: And I once dislocated my thumb getting off a couch.
Aly: Okay, you got five more minutes on that hippo, and then we switch.
Quote from Homecoming
Cece: Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Cece Schmidt. So if any of you have anything else you'd like to say to my husband, I will drag you outside and we will handle this L.A. style. I will take you to the corner of Fairfax and La Brea. [crowd booing]
Winston: Those are parallel streets.
Nick: I'm not telling her that.
Louise: That's my daughter! We have to leave. Where's my car?
Jess: Even though your car is definitely here, it's a beautiful night... let's walk.
Winston: Okay, look, she clearly did something weird with your car, but I got something. Trust us.
Cece: Sepulveda! La Cienega, bitches. El Matador beach.
Schmidt: You're just naming places in Southern California.
Cece: Nickel Canyon!
Quote from Mario
Schmidt: How can I survive another nine months of pregnant Cece? She was so mean to me.
Schmidt: I got your wings, my love.
Cece: I wanted all flats, no drumlets! Do they look flat to you?! [muffled grunting] Do they look flat to you?!
Schmidt: She tried to jam the business end of a drumlet straight up my tuchus. And then things got worse. I can only describe what I experienced next as... anti-Semitic.
Cece: Hey, gefilte face! Quit playing "Where's My Foreskin?" and get in here and rub my feet before I divorce your Yentl-loving, Ashkenazi ass!