Coach: Honestly, it took me a while to figure out who I was in that school, but I finally did.
Jess: Who?
Coach: I'm the guy who has sex with everyone.
Jess: Why can't you be the guy who loves recycling?! Everyone loves that guy. This is a school.
Coach: It's a sexy place, Jess. Look at that CPR poster. It's hot as crap.
Jess: What the...? Why aren't they wearing shirts? Are they drinking wine?