Nick: Which one are you dating?
Schmidt: Both.
Nick: Are you dating Cece?
Schmidt: I'm dating Cece.
Nick: Are you dating Elizabeth?
Schmidt: Yes.
Nick: How do you do that?
Schmidt: They made me choose.
Nick: You have to choose. You can't have both women.
Schmidt: What was I supposed to do?
Nick: What, you think you can have a bunch of wives?! You got one wife! This is the way the world works!
Schmidt: Why?!
Nick: I don't know.