Winston: You have to promise me you will not laugh.
Schmidt: Look, I'm... you're not talking to Nick, here. You're talking to Schmidt.
Winston: Schmidt, I think I'm getting my period.
Schmidt: [keeping a straight face] Okay.
Winston: This is a real thing, okay? I looked it up on the Internet. It's called, uh, "sympathy PMS," right? Now, apparently this is an affliction that men suffer from all the time.
Schmidt: Right on. [stifles a giggle]
Winston: I don't know how it happened, man, but somehow, I got on that woman's cycle of menstruation... and I got that menstruation inside of me.
Schmidt: Winston! Men can't get their periods. Where would they put the tampon?
Winston: Hey! Are you calling me stupid? You're the one that's stupid, okay? You jack-faced butthole!