Cece: What are you doing?
Jess: I'm packing an overnight bag in case I have one-night sex. I've got a T-shirt, socks...
Cece: Is this a sewing kit?
Jess: Yes, it's a sewing kit. Stain remover. [sings] Hello?
Cece: You don't have one-night stands, you get way too attached. I mean, you could have an emotional connection with a shoe on the side of the road.
Jess: Oh, one shoe? I hate that.
Cece: Is this Schmidt's idea?
Jess: It's my idea. I want to try a one-night stand. Tonight... is all about what Little Jess wants. Little Jess.
Cece: Okay, all right. I am gonna text Kyle and tell him to meet us at the bar, because I'm not leaving you alone like this... with all of that.
Jess: [spraying perfume towards her crotch] I'm sorry, I don't know who's smelling what tonight.