Jess: Oh, no. Schmidt, um, that's your dad.
Schmidt & Cece: What?
Schmidt: What-what is my dad doing at our front door?
Jess: He thinks we're going on a date.
Schmidt: Why would he think that, Jess?
Jess: Because I said, "Let's go on a date." I'll get rid of him. Go to your room and close the door.
Schmidt: Do not tell me what to do; you are not my mom. [Jess gasps]
Cece: Oh, that's disgusting.