Coach: What is he...? What are you doing, man?
Schmidt: [holding two small, mandarin oranges] Is this...? Is this the fut... the future? I can hold them both in one hand.
Coach: Yeah, man.
Schmidt: [sighs] No, no, there it is. Look at that. Stage four-- depression. My two best friends are going away. Going away far too soon. And if you were lucky enough to meet them, to touch them, to be touched by them, you came away a better person. If you'll excuse me.