Schmidt: Okay, Jess, how can I put this? You're the prize here. Okay? You are the last piece of pie, and all of these guys are the fat kids in the cafeteria, and I can say that because I used to be fat as a truck.
Jess: You really think I'm the last piece of pie?
Schmidt: Damn right you're the last piece of pie. You're the best girl on Dice, Jess. And who cares what these guys are feeling? You know, what do you feel? Jess, what do you want?
Jess: I'm the pie.
Schmidt: You're the pie.
Jess: I'm the pie.
Schmidt: Say it again.
Jess: I'm the pie.
Schmidt: Say it again.
Jess: I'm the pie.
Schmidt: There you go.
Jess: Who are you?
Schmidt: Never really thought about that.