Beth: Another bathroom break, Schmidt? You know, I've been timing you all day. Seven minutes and 23 seconds. I wonder what was going on in there. Hmm? You pooped.
Schmidt: Can you stop timing me, please? It's ridiculous that you do that.
Beth: I will break you. Hey, Lisa! You were on fire last night, girl! [to Schmidt] I'm taking her job.
Schmidt: What did you do last night?
Beth: Everyone from the office went to Jill's bachelorette party.
Schmidt: Why don't I get invited places? Is it because I'm the only man in the office?
Beth: "Man." That's adorable.