Jess: Okay, Pepper-heads! Get ready for a memorable experience, which I hope you will recount at your weddings, which I will also be at, brought to you by your favorite principal-slash-friend, Jessica Day. Please welcome your favorite author, Nick Miller! [girls cheering] Yay!
Nick: No, no, no. Stop it, stop it. All right, let's get this over with. Uh, let's talk about the book you guys most certainly don't understand because it wasn't written for you or people your age. Go ahead.