Adrian Monk Quote #2493
Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Takes the Stand
Evan Gildea: I read about that. The auto store. I thought you caught that kid.
Adrian Monk: There was a young man in the store. He robbed the place, he grabbed a few bucks, but he didn't kill anyone. Here's what happened.
Captain Stottlemeyer: What?
Adrian Monk: Nothing. It just feels good to say that again, especially to him. Here's what happened. You drove to San Francisco, and you murdered your wife, no matter what the jury said, you murdered your wife. But as you were leaving, you had a problem. One of your taillights was burned out. You couldn't driving home like that. If the cops stopped you, your alibi would be ruined. There was an auto parts store up the street, you ran in to buy a new bulb, you were gonna pay cash, nobody would ever know you were there.
Captain Stottlemeyer: But your timing was terrible.
Adrian Monk: Now you had a bigger problem. As soon as she reported it, the cops would take a look at the security tape.
Captain Stottlemeyer: And we'd see you in the store three blocks away from where your wife was killed, and you couldn't afford that.
Evan Gildea: If it's all right with you, I'm gonna wait for my attorney. His name is Harrison Powell. I think you might remember him.
Adrian Monk: Leland, he's in my head again.
Captain Stottlemeyer: No, Monk, he's actually he's here.
Adrian Monk: Oh, thank God.
Monk Quotes
‘Mr. Monk Takes the Stand’ Quotes
Quote from Adrian Monk
[flashback:]
Lieutenant Disher: Were you alone?
Evan Gildea: No. I was with her. [removes a sheet covering a sculpture of a naked woman]
Adrian Monk: [squeaks]
[present, in the court room:]
Adrian Monk: [squeaks]
Harrison Powell: Mr. Monk, are you okay?
Adrian Monk: I'm fine.
Judge Santa Croce: You were making a noise.
Adrian Monk: I don't think so.
Judge Santa Croce: Could you read that back, please?
Stenographer: Witness: The defendant removed a sheet revealing a naked... [squeaks]
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: There's a camera?
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, but the recorder's empty. Which means the killer must have taken the tape.
Adrian Monk: But your friend Rudy is short. He's, what, 5'4"?
Lieutenant Disher: 5'4 1/4".
Adrian Monk: Well, he couldn't reach that shelf. There's no stepping stool. "He didn't need a stepping stool, former detective Monk. There are hundreds of things here he could have stood on." "Why are you crying, former detective Monk? "Why don't you stop wasting everyone's time and get the hell out of here?"
Natalie: Objection! Badgering yourself.
Adrian Monk: Overruled.
Quote from Lieutenant Disher
[flashback:]
Lieutenant Disher: Looks like a straight-up break-in. Punches a hole through this window. Opens the door from the inside. She wakes up. They fight. He takes that statue from here hits her once. So, base of the skull. Medulla oblongata. Killed her instantly.
Adrian Monk: Nah, I don't think so. That hole's pretty small. I don't think anyone could fit their hand through there.
Lieutenant Disher: Sure they could.
[present:]
Charles Friedkin: And did you determine whether Monk was right?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Yes, sir. Lieutenant Disher ran a field test to be certain.
[flashback:]
Lieutenant Disher: [whimpers] Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
[present:]
Judge Santa Croce: Excuse me. I'm sorry to interrupt. I saw Lieutenant Disher in the hall before the trial. I couldn't help but notice both of his hands were bandaged.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Yes, ma'am. He wanted to be sure, so he tried it again with the other arm.
Judge Santa Croce: He tried it again?
Captain Stottlemeyer: He's very thorough.