Adrian Monk Quote #1299
Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Can't See a Thing
Adrian Monk: He's not the guy.
Jake Colbert: I've been trying to tell you. I found that coat in a dumpster. I get cold at night. I sleep in a cardboard box at the beach. My life sucks!
Adrian Monk: What are you complaining about? At least you can see.
Jake Colbert: Oh, I got plenty to complain about. Don't get me started. No, no. I've got a nine-year-old dog that needs a new kidney.
Adrian Monk: I had a bucket of acid thrown in my face. I think I win.
Jake Colbert: I haven't had a hot meal in three years.
Adrian Monk: My wife is dead.
Jake Colbert: So is mine.
Adrian Monk: Car bomb?
Jake Colbert: Pneumonia.
Adrian Monk: Natalie, car bomb or pneumonia?
Natalie: Mr. Monk, I don't know.
Jake Colbert: Yeah, I bet your wife didn't suffer.
Adrian Monk: Trudy lived for 20 minutes in pain, alone. Y- You're an amateur. Come back when you got something. Who's next? Come on. Anybody. You're looking at the most miserable man on Earth. Oh, hey, you. How 'bout you? How 'bout you? You want a piece of me? I'll take you all on at the same time. I can't lose! I- I can't lose.
Monk Quotes
‘Mr. Monk Can't See a Thing’ Quotes
Quote from Natalie
Natalie: I am not going anywhere. Look at me. Sorry. Your life is not over. You could still do anything. There've been lots of blind people who have done great and amazing things.
Adrian Monk: Like who?
Natalie: Like Ray Charles. And, um, you know...
Adrian Monk: Yeah?
Natalie: You know, uh, I mean, come on. Uh... Uh... Uh... Mr. Magoo.
Adrian Monk: Who's that?
Natalie: Mr. Magoo? Oh, gosh, he was a great man. Um... an inventor.
Adrian Monk: Really?
Natalie: An entrepreneur, if you will. He did lots of amazing, amazing things.
Adrian Monk: And he was blind?
Natalie: I don't want to talk about Mr. Magoo anymore.
Adrian Monk: Me neither.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: [recorded] This is Adrian... Monk. Thank you for calling my new answering machine. When you hear the beep noise please speak into the telephone receiver, and leave a message which I will play back and listen to later. This is the end of the message. And here is the beep I was talking about. [beep]
Quote from Dr. Kroger
Dr. Kroger: All right, Adrian, wh- Wh- What about your work?
Adrian Monk: My work? My work's great. I'd say I'm operating at or just below Magoo level.
Dr. Kroger: Adrian, I have to tell you I'm a little concerned. Now, there are five stages of grief, and I think you've already leapfrogged over at least the first three of them. And I think any doctor-
Adrian Monk: I'm sorry to interrupt. I was just thinking. You could be naked right now, and it wouldn't bother me.
Dr. Kroger: Adrian, I'm not naked.
Adrian Monk: But you could be.
Dr. Kroger: Look it, Adrian. I think that you're using this condition as an excuse to cut yourself off from the real world, even more than usual. And the pendulum will swing back.
Adrian Monk: I don't think so.
Dr. Kroger: Yes, it will. This is what pendulums do. You could come crashing down. It would be very painful. I- I-I just refuse to believe that you are happy - genuinely happy - having lost your eyesight.
Adrian Monk: It's the best thing that ever happened to me.
Dr. Kroger: Oh, okay, fine. Well, then, why don't we get some ear plugs, and some nose plugs? And then you can just cut yourself off completely from the world.
Adrian Monk: Yeah.
Dr. Kroger: Or maybe we could arrange to have you put into a coma.
Adrian Monk: Well, let's try the ear plug thing first.