Adrian Monk Quote #916
Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Stays in Bed
Natalie: [answers phone] Hello.
Adrian Monk: Natalie. Natalie, it is me, Adrian Monk.
Natalie: Yes, Mr. Monk. We were just talking about you.
Adrian Monk: Natalie, you have to come back.
Natalie: Mr. Monk, I can't right now. I'm at the pizzeria, talking to the manager.
Adrian Monk: It's Ebola.
Natalie: Excuse me?
Adrian Monk: I have the Ebola virus.
Natalie: Mr. Monk, you don't have the Ebola virus.
Adrian Monk: Oh, I'm pretty sure I do. I have all the symptoms. I have the fever and the headache and the massive internal bleeding.
Natalie: You have massive internal bleeding?
Adrian Monk: I believe I do. That is my opinion.
Natalie: No, Mr. Monk, you have the flu. But I'm glad you called. I'm talking to Mr. Gorman. He's the manager. Hold on.
Mr. Gorman: [takes phone] Hello. I don't know. I think they're in Atlanta.
Natalie: What's he talking about?
Mr. Gorman: He's asking about the Center for Disease Control.
Monk Quotes
‘Mr. Monk Stays in Bed’ Quotes
Quote from Lieutenant Disher
Lieutenant Disher: Did you hear anything? I mean, anybody yelling or screaming for help?
Natalie: Yeah, me. Does it ever get to you? Seeing people dead?
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, it did for a while. But I got used to it.
Natalie: That must be awful. Getting used to it.
Lieutenant Disher: You know, it was pretty awful. But I got used to it. It's the worst part, you know. Getting used to it. Something you never really get used to.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: It's not straight.
Natalie: Ha! The bubble's right in the middle.
Adrian Monk: The level's broken.
Natalie: The level is not broken, Mr. Monk. It can't be broken. It's a bubble on a stick. You have two levels?
Adrian Monk: I use this level to check the other levels. It's my level-checking level.
Julie Teeger: How do you know that one's not broken?
Adrian Monk: That's a good question. I take my level-checking level to the hardware store twice a year to have it recalibrated.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: Could you turn this? Thank you. Well, that's good.
Captain Stottlemeyer: What is this thing?
Adrian Monk: It's a humidifier.
Captain Stottlemeyer: What's that one?
Adrian Monk: It's a dehumidifier.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Well, don't they cancel each other out?
Adrian Monk: Exactly.