Captain Stottlemeyer: Hey, I wonder how Natalie and Randy are doing. I love weddings. Did you know that I met Karen at a wedding? I love weddings anyway. [sees Monk is down] Yep. You know who had a great wedding? You did. You and Trudy. Now, that was a great day. Where is that photo album?
Adrian Monk: She was... Wow!
Captain Stottlemeyer: Beautiful.
Adrian Monk: I remember during the service she was crying so hard, she couldn't even say the words, "I do." Have you ever seen anybody cry so much?
Captain Stottlemeyer: That was you, Monk. And, no, I have not.

Lieutenant Disher: What's that?
Captain Stottlemeyer: It's cellophane. Monk's idea.
Adrian Monk: It's to protect the cake. Makes it more fun.
Lieutenant Disher: For what?
Adrian Monk: Well, when you blow out the candles, there's always a little, what I call, spittle.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Actually a pretty good idea. It's a birthday cake spittle shield. You know, that's the first idea that you've had that I might actually consider investing in.
Adrian Monk: Thank you.
Natalie: Make a wish. [Disher takes a long, thoughtful moment]
Captain Stottlemeyer: Blow out the candles, lieutenant.
[As Randy blows out the candles, the flames spread to the cellophane cover which ignites. As Randy tries to blow out the fire, Stottlemeyer uses a fire extinguisher.]
Adrian Monk: Hey, happy birthday.
Captain Stottlemeyer: I think I might reconsider that investment.

Natalie: You broke into her room? Is that legal?
Captain Stottlemeyer: You don't need a search warrant to go into a hotel room if it's after checkout.
Adrian Monk: Is that true?
Captain Stottlemeyer: I don't know.