Adrian Monk Quote #459
Julie: I know you want your badge back more than anything, and I already talked to Professor Emory about your situation.
Adrian Monk: Professor Em- Eugene Emory? At Garland College?
Julie: That's right. I'm in his class.
Adrian Monk: Oh, my God! I just read his book.
Julie: Oh, yeah. We have a test on that next week.
Adrian Monk: It It's wonderful.
Julie: What's it about?
Adrian Monk: Oh, well, it's an argument for tort reform. Professor Emory feels that we could eliminate all superfluous litigation if we cap punitive damages and hold the plaintiff liable for any court expenses. [off her confused look] Well, I'm sure you could get out of the test because your grandmother...
Julie: Right. Whew!
Quote from Adrian Monk
Captain Stottlemeyer: All right. Maybe it wasn't you. Maybe it was some of your old playmates trying to relive their glory days.
Adrian Monk: Maybe they missed the buzz. You look familiar, Ronnie. Didn't I see you last week at the opera?
Ron Abrash: The opera? What have you been smoking, man?
Adrian Monk: I've been smoking the truth, man!
Ron Abrash: What are you guys doing good cop, crazy cop?
Quote from Adrian Monk
Captain Stottlemeyer: Monk, listen to me. Listen. I think that you you failed that test on purpose. You- You don't want to get your badge back on a technicality, right? You want to earn it. You will. Adrian, you will. You'll... You're gonna be a great cop again. You're gonna do it the right way, and I respect you for that. Now, open the door. Monk! Open that damn door! I'm gonna give you until three.
Adrian Monk: [o.s.] A.M. or P.M.?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Not three o'clock, you fool!
Quote from Mr. Monk and the Daredevil
Natalie: Where are you going?
Adrian Monk: Bathroom.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Why? [Monk is silent] I'll go with you.
Adrian Monk: I don't think so.
Captain Stottlemeyer: No, let me go with you.
Natalie: We promised Dr. Kroger we wouldn't leave you alone.
Adrian Monk: I am not suicidal. I just wish I was never born. There's a difference.
Quote from Mr. Monk Is At Your Service
Natalie: Are you afraid of frogs?
Adrian Monk: I don't know. I've never been this close to one. [A frog lands on Monk's shoe] Yes. The answer is yes. Put frogs on the list. Where's the list?
Natalie: I got it. I got it. Where does it go?
Adrian Monk: Put them between possums and, uh, soccer riots. No, no, no. Uh, after after soccer riots. And before, uh, before hailstones. Yeah, so it goes...
Natalie: I got it, I got it: Soccer riots, frogs, hailstones.
Adrian Monk: At least now we know. Information really is power.