Captain Stottlemeyer Quote #45
Quote from Captain Stottlemeyer in Mr. Monk Goes to the Circus
Lieutenant Disher: Nikolai Petroff?
Nikolai Petroff: Who's asking?
Lieutenant Disher: This shiny little piece of metal's asking. Are you Nikolai Petroff?
Nikolai Petroff: Are you trying to scare me? Huh? This pussycat weighs a couple hundred pounds. It could rip me apart in a heartbeat. I ain't scared of her. You think I'm scared of you?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Excuse me. You may not be scared of the lieutenant, but you've got plenty of reason to be scared of me. 'Cause I got a little cage like that downtown. It's not much bigger than that, actually. It's not a whole lot friendlier. And if you obstruct my investigation, sir, for one moment further, you're gonna spend some time in it.
‘Mr. Monk Goes to the Circus’ Quotes
Quote from Adrian Monk
Sharona: You okay?
Adrian Monk: I'm not really in my comfort zone here.
Sharona: You have a comfort zone?
Adrian Monk: Yes, I have a comfort zone.
Sharona: I've never seen a comfort zone.
Adrian Monk: It's not very big. It's, uh It's kind of small. I-I don't have a comfort zone.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Sharona: My fear is irrational? As opposed to what, your fears?
Adrian Monk: Well, the stuff I'm afraid of is, you know, based on fact.
Sharona: It is?
Adrian Monk: Like germs.
Sharona: Like, uh, crooked paintings? And-And sidewalk cracks? And- And food touching? And the wind?
Adrian Monk: Hey, the wind can kill. Hurricane Edna?
Sharona: Milk?
Adrian Monk: At least they're things people actually encounter. You have to make an appointment to see an elephant. You have to sign up for a safari or something.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: Is this a dollop?
Sharona: What?
Adrian Monk: A dollop. It says, "Add one dollop of whipped cream."
Sharona: I don't know. I think a dollop's, like, a teaspoon.
Adrian Monk: Yeah, it doesn't say "teaspoon." It says "dollop."
Sharona: It doesn't matter. It doesn't have to be exact. I- l- It's like a pinch.
Sharona: How many pinches to a dollop?
Adrian Monk: I don't know. Well, maybe it's more like a schmear. I think it's three pinches to a schmear. Or, uh... Ah, forget it. Forget it! Let's make something else.
Sharona: What? You're throwing it out?
Adrian Monk: Nobody can make this cocoa. The recipe's impossible.