Captain Stottlemeyer Quote #382

Quote from Captain Stottlemeyer in Mr. Monk and the Lady Next Door

Adrian Monk: So how does he look?
Captain Stottlemeyer: He looks good to me. He smells like the guy.
Adrian Monk: But?
Captain Stottlemeyer: But he has an alibi. He says he was home. That at 10:30, at the time of the robbery, he was playing his drum set.
Lieutenant Disher: And it does check out. According to our phone log, you called the station at 10:35 pm to complain about the noise.
Marge Johnson: Yes I did. I didn't want to bother you again, you know. Sit up, darling.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Ms. Johnson.
Adrian Monk: Marge.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Marge, this is very important. Now, are you sure- Are you positive that you heard Mr.
Keyes at 10:30 playing his drum kit last night?
Marge Johnson: Yes. I not only heard it, I saw him. The light was on and I could look right through the window at him. It- You know, it was definitely him.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Hello, square one. Thank you.

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 ‘Mr. Monk and the Lady Next Door’ Quotes

Quote from Lieutenant Disher

Natalie: All right, so they broke in, they killed a security guard, and stole an egg-eating robot.
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, could the machine possibly be involved?
Captain Stottlemeyer: What'd you say?
Lieutenant Disher: Well, in science fiction, they sometimes come alive. They become sentient. If this were a movie, you'd believe me.
Captain Stottlemeyer: If this were a movie, I could walk out, Randy.

Quote from Lieutenant Disher

Lieutenant Disher: It looks like it's an inside job. Security tapes are missing, and the store gets re-supplied the first Tuesday of every month.
Captain Stottlemeyer: And that was yesterday, so he was plugged in somehow. We're putting together some names, going back ten years, everybody that's ever worked here.
Adrian Monk: You don't have to go back ten years. The manager only worked here for a year. The killer wore a ski mask, ergo, the killer was afraid he'd be recognized, ergo, the killer must have worked here recently.
Lieutenant Disher: "Ergo" the killer? What's that, Hungarian?
Captain Stottlemeyer: His name isn't "Ergo," Randy.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Dr. Bell: You're a lucky man. [off Monk's silence] Adrian? Talk to me. Come on.
Adrian Monk: What's the catch?
Dr. Bell: With what?
Adrian Monk: With Marge. What do you suppose she's after?
Dr. Bell: All right, Adrian-
Adrian Monk: Every time somebody wants to be my friend, it turns out they're after something. They have an angle.
Dr. Bell: No, not necessarily.
Adrian Monk: How could somebody- How could anybody love me unconditionally? I mean, come on. You've met me.
Dr. Bell: Adrian, I know you've been burned in the past, but you have to trust people. See, there's not always a catch.
Adrian Monk: Then how do you explain this? There's always a catch.