Adrian Monk Quote #2034
Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Gets Lotto Fever
Stan Lawrence: The same numbers.
Captain Stottlemeyer: But that's not possible.
Lotto Commissioner: That's what we thought. So we tried again.
Stan Lawrence: And again. And again. And the same six numbers kept popping up. Not always in the same order, but they very same numbers. How did that happen?
Captain Stottlemeyer: They're very lucky numbers.
Adrian Monk: Metallic paint.
Lotto Commissioner: Very good, Mr. Monk. We took a closer look. The numbers on these six balls, and only these six balls, were painted with metal-based paint. All the others are acrylic-based.
Adrian Monk: There's a magnet in the microphone.
Lotto Commissioner: Right again, Mr. Monk.
Stan Lawrence: An electromagnet, battery-operated. Strong enough to pull these six balls and only these balls up the chute.
Natalie: Well, we didn't put that there.
Lotto Commissioner: Oh, Ms. Teeger, please. Don't insult us. You started working here two weeks ago. You had access to the equipment. Suddenly your friend wins what? $106 million.
Stan Lawrence: I suggest you both get good lawyers.
Captain Stottlemeyer: What?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Hey, Monk. Monk, you got anything?
Adrian Monk: There were two winners. What happened to the other man? The truck driver.
Lotto Commissioner: Eugene Maddox. We've already talked to his lawyers. He's agreed not to sue us in exchange for a rather generous settlement.
Adrian Monk: I'm sure he did.
Monk Quotes
‘Mr. Monk Gets Lotto Fever’ Quotes
Quote from Lieutenant Disher
Captain Stottlemeyer: What's that? "It looks like her number came up."
Lieutenant Disher: It's a zinger. She's a lotto girl. Her number came up. Get it? You remember last year Sergeant Beecham shoved that junkie into a lamp post, and he said, "I'll keep you posted."
Captain Stottlemeyer: Oh, yeah. I heard about that.
Lieutenant Disher: Everybody heard about it. I mean, people were repeating it. It was famous. This is even better. This is a classic.
Captain Stottlemeyer: If you say so.
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, I just need to find the right moment.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: Or maybe I just feel insulted.
Dr. Bell: Insulted?
Adrian Monk: What I do is hard. I am out there. I am sweating out every clue. I'm putting killers behind bars. What does she do? What does she do?! [picks up calendar] 91. Number 91! 91. Number 91. I mean, how hard is that? A talking monkey could do her job. It's embarrassing.
Dr. Bell: Actually, that's 16. See, you're holding it upside down.
Adrian Monk: Oh, it's confusing. There's usually a little line under the nine.
Dr. Bell: It goes under the six. The line goes under the six.
Adrian Monk: I'm pretty sure it's the nine.
Dr. Bell: It's no big deal. I've seen it my whole life.
Adrian Monk: I've never seen it under the six.
Dr. Bell: Why don't we ask Natalie then? She's the expert.
Adrian Monk: Okay, okay.
Dr. Bell: But I see your point. About the monkey.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: I know, but here's the thing. Tomorrow is Wednesday. Oh, we already made plans.
Natalie: What plans? Me making dinner while you vacuum the rug?
Adrian Monk: Exactly. And here's the other thing. If I let you take a night off, I have to let everybody take a night off.
Natalie: Who's everybody? What are you talking about? It's just me.
Natalie: Mr. Monk, come on. It's one night.
Adrian Monk: Well, then I'll guess I'll just have to say no... Kay. No kay. No kay.
Stan Lawrence: Which is it? "No" or "okay?"
Adrian Monk: Nokay. Nokay.
Natalie: He's trying to say okay. That's as close as he's ever gonna get.
Stan Lawrence: Nokay?
Adrian Monk: Nokay.