Captain Stottlemeyer Quote #219
Quote from Captain Stottlemeyer in Mr. Monk and the Captain's Marriage
Captain Stottlemeyer: Heck of a thing, huh? Actually, it's kind of flattering if you think about it. He picked me because he knew that I would react. 'cause he could tell how much I love you.
Karen Stottlemeyer: It's not flattering, Leland.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Look, Karen. I know that I've got a temper, but I've been working on it. I've got a yo-yo. Actually, I, uh, the yo-yo broke when I threw it at the guy.
Karen Stottlemeyer: Why didn't you believe me?
Captain Stottlemeyer: I had Monk follow you yesterday afternoon. He saw you meeting a man.
Karen Stottlemeyer: You had me followed?
Captain Stottlemeyer: You wanna tell me about him?
Karen Stottlemeyer: His name is Max Tepperton. He's a divorce lawyer.
Captain Stottlemeyer: You've been sleeping with a divorce lawyer? You know what? It doesn't matter. Because I forgive you, Karen. Hell, I'm no saint. We'll get past this.
Karen Stottlemeyer: No, Leland. He's representing me.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Stottlemeyer vs. Stottlemeyer. Why?
Karen Stottlemeyer: Because you have to ask why, Leland. That's why.
‘Mr. Monk and the Captain's Marriage’ Quotes
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: Look. $10.03. That's how much is in there.
Natalie: Okay, thank you. Now we know.
Adrian Monk: Yeah, I think we should make it even.
Natalie: What are you talking about?
Adrian Monk: The fountain. We take out three cents and that'll be 10 dollars. It's a nice round number. 10 dollars. Then everyone would be happier.
Natalie: You always say that. Who is everyone?
Adrian Monk: Me. Me.
Natalie: You want me to reach in here and take out 3 pennies?
Adrian Monk: Would you mind?
Natalie: Yes, I would.
Natalie: Look, look, she's moving again. We gotta go. Mr. Monk, if we walk now, we won't even think about the fountain.
Adrian Monk: I'll think about it. It would haunt me.
Natalie: The three extra pennies. It would haunt you?
Adrian Monk: It will haunt me.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: [to a kid on the jungle gym] Careful. Both your hands. That's too high. These things are death traps. It's not just my opinion. It's a fact. In Belgium, 1952, a kid almost died on one of those.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: Look at all this junk. They should get rid of it. And put it somewhere.
Natalie: Well, they did it, Mr. Monk. They put it here. It's a junkyard.
Adrian Monk: You can say that again.