Adrian Monk Quote #808

Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Gets Stuck in Traffic

Sgt. Parnell: You're not still here, are you?
Adrian Monk: No. Yes. Yes, Sergeant, I'm telling you, there's something wrong with this crime scene.
Sgt. Parnell: It's an accident scene, sir.
Adrian Monk: But he never slowed down. There are no skid marks.
Sgt. Parnell: Well, perhaps he fell asleep or he had a heart attack. It happens all the time.
Adrian Monk: Sergeant, this guy, who was he? What did he do?
Sgt. Parnell: He worked for a nonprofit environmental group. He was some sort of activist.
Adrian Monk: Of course. Do you know what he was working on?
Sgt. Parnell: You used to be a cop, right?
Adrian Monk: Right. All right. Then maybe you can appreciate this. I will tell you what I do know about the victim. His name was Steve Marriot. He died in a tragic single car accident. There is no doubt about that. We have an eyewitness. The driver of that truck saw the whole thing. The victim's car was spinning out of control. It was traveling at 80, 85 miles per hour. There was nobody else in the vehicle. There was nobody else near the vehicle. Nobody else ran from the vehicle. Okay?
Adrian Monk: But Sergeant...
Sgt. Parnell: Look, Detective, or whatever you are, I've been very patient with you, sir. You have to let this go.

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 ‘Mr. Monk Gets Stuck in Traffic’ Quotes

Quote from Julie Teeger

Julie Teeger: I'm going to pee all over the seat.
Adrian Monk: Natalie.
Natalie: Honey, honey, there is a rest stop up ahead. You're okay.
Julie Teeger: Maybe when there's pee all over the back seat, maybe then you'll believe me.
Adrian Monk: Uh, okay. Julie, wait. No, don't don't don't do that. Not, not in the car. I will give you $10 to hold it in.
Julie Teeger: Really?
Natalie: What are you doing? You can't pay a person not to pee.
Adrian Monk: Best money I ever spent.
Julie Teeger: Oh, sure he can. It's called "the free market." I learned about it in school. So, Mr. Monk, how much would you pay me not to throw up?

Quote from Natalie

Natalie: So, what happened up there?
Adrian Monk: A guy was killed.
Natalie: Oh, my God.
Julie Teeger: Mr. Monk says he was murdered.
Natalie: Of course he does. You know, Mr. Monk, there'd be no crime in all of San Francisco if you never left your house.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Julie Teeger: Mom, I gotta go.
Natalie: Sweetie, why didn't you go at the game? There was a porta-john right there.
Julie Teeger: I wanted to, but Mr. Monk says it wasn't sanitary.
Adrian Monk: You'll thank me later.