Adrian Monk Quote #707
Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk and the Game Show
Roddy Lankman: You know how we play our game. You have five questions. Let's see how you do. Adrian, who was the first president to win the Nobel Peace Prize?
Adrian Monk: Roddy, I understand I can phone a friend.
Roddy Lankman: You want to phone a friend on the first question. Well, you're the boss. Tanya, let's bring him the phone. For those joining us for the first time, Adrian is going to call a friend to see if he can get a little help on this very important bonus round question. All right, who would you like to call?
Adrian Monk: Well, Roddy, I would like to call... him.
Val Birch: Me? You want to call me? I don't think I'm at home.
Roddy Lankman: Well, Mr. Monk, what are you doing?
Kevin Dorfman: [to Dwight Ellison] Do you know what he's doing? Because I don't know what he's doing.
Adrian Monk: I'm trying to prove that you are guilty of murder, Mr. Lankman, or at the very least, manslaughter. Lizzie Talvo, your personal assistant, discovered that you were cheating on the show.
Roddy Lankman: Uh, can we go to a commercial?
Dwight Ellison: [to the producer] You do and you're fired.
Adrian Monk: She died about a month ago in a car crash, and this man has been blackmailing you ever since, and you have been paying him off, here on your show, by feeding him the answers.
Susan: I knew it. Do over.
Adrian Monk: Mr. Birch, you were in Bluestone Valley the night she died. You must have seen the crash. She was still alive when you got to the car. She had to have said something to you before she died. Something about Mr. Lankman. You must have realized you just hit the jackpot. You called your own answering machine and recorded her dying words.
Val Birch: You can't prove any of this.
Adrian Monk: I was at your house yesterday, and I happened to hear the date and time stamp of a phone message that you had saved May 2nd, 7:39 P.M. I think I can prove it, sir. What's your number?
Dwight Ellison: [over P.A.] Adrian, it's 555-0137.
Adrian Monk: Thank you, Dwight. [dials]
Val Birch: Hi, this is your old pal Val. Leave your message when you hear the beep. [Adrian enters the code] 4..8.
Male Voice: You have one saved message. May 2nd, 7:39 P.M.
Female Voice: It was Roddy. It was Roddy Lankman. He was cheating on the show. I was going to blow the whistle. He cut my brakes. Roddy.
Monk Quotes
‘Mr. Monk and the Game Show’ Quotes
Quote from Kevin Dorfman
Kevin Dorfman: Oh, this is looking good.
Adrian Monk: You think so?
Kevin Dorfman: Oh, it's looking fantastic. A little more mayonnaise, a pinch of paprika. Maybe two pinches. Maybe three pinches.
Adrian Monk: Okay, that's perfect.
Kevin Dorfman: Maybe four pinches.
Adrian Monk: Okay, Kevin, I think that's enough. Thank you.
Kevin Dorfman: We are going to need some pepper, and I think I have some upstairs. Maybe I should bring all my seasonings down here if we're going to be cooking all week.
Adrian Monk: All week?
Kevin Dorfman: Here's something you might find interesting. This is only the eighth time in my life I have ever had egg salad.
Adrian Monk: Really?
Kevin Dorfman: And how much do you want to bet I can name all eight? The first time was in third grade. I traded sandwiches with a kid named Stuart Kramer. Then three years after that, my cousin's confirmation party. Two years after that, I was in a restaurant. I ordered tuna fish. Do you like to laugh?
Adrian Monk: No, I don't.
Kevin Dorfman: Well, get ready to, because I knew it was egg salad. I could smell it, but the waitress kept saying to me, "No, it's tuna fish." [phone rings] Phone. We're on number three. Remember where we are.
Quote from Kevin Dorfman
Kevin Dorfman: Wow. Wow. Is that your show? Because I love that show. Who comes up with all those questions?
Dwight Ellison: Well, we have a staff of writers.
Kevin Dorfman: 'Cause I'll tell you something, that is something I've always thought I would be good at. I'm always asking people questions, and a lot of the time, they are genuinely stumped.
Adrian Monk: That's true. We are.
Quote from Kevin Dorfman
Kevin Dorfman: Mr. E., here's your coffee. Sorry it took so long. I'm still not used to that kitchen. Careful. It's hot.
Dwight Ellison: Thank you, Kevin. Oh. There's something in there.
Kevin Dorfman: That's a raisin. Yeah, I put it in to sweeten the coffee. Little trick I picked up when I was waiting tables in Aspen, Colorado, which I did for two summers. Not two consecutive summers, 'cause there was a summer in between...
Dwight Ellison: Thank you, Kevin.
Adrian Monk: Thank you, Kevin.