Oliver: My name is Oliver. I'm gonna take you to see Dr. Lancaster. He's anxious to meet you.
Sharona: Oliver, listen, there's some things you should know. I've been taking care of this man for four years. These are his moist towelettes for germs. He takes three showers every day with this star-shaped nozzle. This is the nozzle. And he needs a five-watt night-light for sleeping. Anything more, he won't sleep. And dark-colored pillowcases.
Adrian Monk: Sharona?
Sharona: Nothing light, okay?
Adrian Monk: Sharona?
Sharona: What?
Adrian Monk: You're scaring the man.
Sharona: No, I'm not.
Adrian Monk: Well, you're scaring me.

Sharona: [answers phone] Hello?
Adrian Monk: Sharona. Don't laugh, okay? I just need to be sure.
Sharona: Is there a skinny oak tree by the window?
Adrian Monk: Yes.
Sharona: Is there an armoire by the closet?
Adrian Monk: Uh-uh.
Sharona: And is Trudy's picture on the nightstand?
Adrian Monk: Yep.
Sharona: Adrian. You're in your own house. Now go to sleep.
Adrian Monk: Thanks. Good news. I'm seriously considering you for Employee of the Month.
Sharona: Thanks, boss. I'll see you tomorrow.

Sharona: Hi. I'm told that Dr. Conrad Gould left all of his papers to your library, and I need to see his journals from 1998.
Chet: Do you have an I.D.?
Sharona: Not on me. I left it in my car.
Chet: I can look you up.
Sharona: Uh, well Here's the thing. I'm not actually enrolled here at the present time.
Chet: Well, the library's for students only.
Sharona: Really? [looks down] Is there a Chet that works here?
Chet: I'm Chet.
Sharona: Oh, my God. This is so funny. I was told to ask for you. See, I met this guy at a party who said that you were really cool and that you would let me do a little research here as a favor.
Chet: Uh, what guy?
Sharona: He was, um... Oh, he was tall, wore glasses.
Chet: Ross Kelton?
Sharona: That's right. That's right. Ross Kelton.
Chet: Ross Kelton said I was cool?
Sharona: Was he wrong?