Monk Quote of the Day

Wednesday, February 28, 2024

Quote from Lieutenant Disher in Mr. Monk Goes to the Hospital

Nurse: It's not possible. Mr. Johansen never left his room. He's been on the heart monitor all night. Here's a cardiogram. No gaps, no interruptions.
Lieutenant Disher: Actually, all we know for sure is that he never took the monitor off. What if he took it with him?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Randy, please.
Lieutenant Disher: No, it's possible. I mean, all he had to do was strap the monitor to his back. And then climb out the window, shimmy down one story, unspooling 600 feet of wire along the way.
Nurse: He's 82 years old.
Lieutenant Disher: He's a veteran. They were the Greatest Generation.
Captain Stottlemeyer: You through?

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Recent Quotes

Tuesday, February 27, 2024

Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Gets Fired

Adrian Monk: Sharona said I should start off with a joke to break the ice.
Ms. Lennington: Who's Sharona?
Adrian Monk: My nurse. Do you like Marmaduke?
Ms. Lennington: Who?
Adrian Monk: He's in the comics. He's a dog. But he's big. He's the biggest dog in the world. Today, he got stuck in the doggie door again. And the man said, "At least this time, he's facing the right way." [slight chuckle] You can learn a lot from Marmaduke.
Ms. Lennington: I think I just did.

Monday, February 26, 2024

Quote from Sharona in Mr. Monk and the Billionaire Mugger

Sharona: Why did you ask about his glasses?
Adrian Monk: So I could tell which photographs were the most recent. There are about 200 pictures in that room. They documented everything.
Sharona: And?
Adrian Monk: No bungee jumping. No skydiving. The most exciting thing Sidney Teal's done in the last two years is go to Disneyland.
Sharona: Not exactly Batman.
Adrian Monk: This guy? He was... What's the opposite of Batman?
Sharona: You are.

Sunday, February 25, 2024

Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Gets Jury Duty

Natalie: Good morning. Picked up your mail. What is going on?
Adrian Monk: Oh, I'm having fun. I love this stuff.
Natalie: Yeah, so I see.
Adrian Monk: You know, I usually don't like shaking hands, but I ever met the man invented Tupperware, I would shake his hand.
Natalie: I think he might be dead.
Adrian Monk: Well, I would still shake his hand, because he's probably perfectly preserved. All right, look. It's virtually airtight. Look at this.

Saturday, February 24, 2024

Quote from Sharona in Mr. Monk Goes Back to School

Adrian Monk: Excuse me. Excuse me. My name is Adrian Monk, and this is Sharona Fleming, my assistant.
Sharona: Col- Colleague.
Adrian Monk: My assistant-slash-colleague.
Sharona: Colleague-slash-assistant.

Friday, February 23, 2024

Quote from Adrian Monk in Happy Birthday, Mr. Monk

Adrian Monk: A self-cleaning vacuum. Do I wake or do I dream?
Natalie: I don't know, Mr. Monk.

Thursday, February 22, 2024

Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Gets Fired

Adrian Monk: Sharona said I should start off with a joke to break the ice.
Ms. Lennington: Who's Sharona?
Adrian Monk: My nurse. Do you like Marmaduke?
Ms. Lennington: Who?
Adrian Monk: He's in the comics. He's a dog. But he's big. He's the biggest dog in the world. Today, he got stuck in the doggie door again. And the man said, "At least this time, he's facing the right way." [slight chuckle] You can learn a lot from Marmaduke.
Ms. Lennington: I think I just did.

Upcoming Quotes

Thursday, February 29, 2024

A quote from Adrian Monk in the episode Mr. Monk Bumps His Head.

Friday, March 1, 2024

A quote from Adrian Monk in the episode Mr. Monk Goes Camping.

Saturday, March 2, 2024

A quote from Adrian Monk in the episode Mr. Monk and the Daredevil.

Sunday, March 3, 2024

A quote from Sharona in the episode Mr. Monk Takes Manhattan.

Monday, March 4, 2024

A quote from Lieutenant Disher in the episode Mr. Monk and the Red Herring.