Monk Quote of the Day

Saturday, January 16, 2021

Quote from Lieutenant Disher in Mr. Monk and the Actor

Lieutenant Disher: Who's playing me? Anybody lined up? Is there any word from casting?
Captain Stottlemeyer: I don't know, Randy.
Lieutenant Disher: I'm thinking Brad Pitt. I mean, if it's in the budget. It's always about the budget.

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Recent Quotes

Friday, January 15, 2021

Quote from Ambrose Monk in Mr. Monk and the Three Pies

Sharona: Did you call the police?
Ambrose Monk: Oh, no. They... They no longer respond to my complaints because I call them more often than I should. I'd like to complain to them about it, but they no longer respond to my complaints.

Thursday, January 14, 2021

Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Gets a New Shrink

Natalie: Is that Harold's file? Are you allowed to do that?
Adrian Monk: Look, I knew it. I knew it! "Paranoia, acute narcissism. Patient believes Adrian Monk is obsessed with him." If anybody is obsessed with anybody, he is obsessed with me. I've been telling Dr. Kroger that for years. We talk about it all the time.
Natalie: Okay, but Mr. Monk, you should not be reading this. How would you feel if someone read your file?
Adrian Monk: My file?
Captain Stottlemeyer: What are you doing?
Adrian Monk: Oh, I just had a theory about the case. I was checking a suspect.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Hey, that's your file.
Adrian Monk: Well, you can't rule anybody out.

Wednesday, January 13, 2021

Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Goes to the Dentist

Captain Stottlemeyer: You and Monk were there, right? Did you notice anything?
Adrian Monk: No, I wasn't really on my game. I have this thing about dentists. Kroger calls it a supermegaphobia. If germs are here and snakes are here, the dentists are... You see that branch up there? The second one from the top? The one above that one.

Tuesday, January 12, 2021

Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk and the Earthquake

Sharona: Uh, Adrian, listen. Now that you're home, there's something we have to talk about.
Adrian Monk: Uh-oh.
Sharona: I haven't been paid since the earthquake.
Adrian Monk: Are you sure?
Sharona: Yeah. It's been three weeks. Here's your checkbook.
Adrian Monk: [speaks gibberish]
Sharona: That's not funny.
Adrian Monk: [speaks gibberish]
Sharona: Okay, will ya stop it? You owe me money.
Adrian Monk: [speaks gibberish]
Sharona: I know you're faking it.
Adrian Monk: I'm not faking it!
Sharona: You just spoke English!

Monday, January 11, 2021

Quote from Natalie in Mr. Monk and His Biggest Fan

Marci Maven: They think I killed Otto?!
Adrian Monk: Well, that would explain quite a bit.
Natalie: Makes a lotta sense.
Marci Maven: No, I-I don't do that, okay? I don't kill things I love.
Natalie: Well, that's reassuring.

Sunday, January 10, 2021

Quote from Natalie in Mr. Monk and the End (Part One)

Natalie: This is for Mr. Monk. This is for me. For Mr. Monk. This is for me. Mr. Monk. Me. Mr. Monk.
Lt. Steven Albright: Sorry, I don't get it, why two separate carts? Why don't we just separate them when we get home?
Natalie: Yeah, I stopped asking those questions a long time ago.

Upcoming Quotes

Sunday, January 17, 2021

A quote from Adrian Monk in the episode Mr. Monk Is On the Air.

Monday, January 18, 2021

A quote from Adrian Monk in the episode Happy Birthday, Mr. Monk.

Tuesday, January 19, 2021

A quote from Benjy Fleming in the episode Mr. Monk and the Employee of the Month.

Wednesday, January 20, 2021

A quote from Captain Stottlemeyer in the episode Mr. Monk and the End (Part Two).

Thursday, January 21, 2021

A quote from Natalie in the episode Mr. Monk and His Biggest Fan.