Jack Monk: What about the proof?
Adrian Monk: This truck is the proof. It's all the evidence we need. As long as we can keep this under 5,000 miles. The District Attorney can introduce the memory chip from the satellite... Why is this thing moving? Is this thing broken?
Jack Monk: Come on.
Adrian Monk: Uh, Jack. Jack!
Jack Monk: Uh-oh.
Adrian Monk: What do you mean "uh-oh?" What does that mean?
Jack Monk: It can mean a variety of things, but in this case, it means no brakes.

Jack Monk: I gotta say something. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you and Ambrose. I'm so sorry. Oh, I'm a bad father. That's all that matters.
Adrian Monk: You're not a bad father. Look at Jack Junior.
Jack Monk: He's a putz!
Adrian Monk: What?
Jack Monk: Actually, he's not even a putz. He dreams one day of becoming a putz. He lives downstairs in my basement. He smokes pot all day long. He steals money from my wallet.
Adrian Monk: He's not a doctor?
Jack Monk: No, I made it up. I lied. I wanted to have a son that I could be proud of. I didn't know I had one in San Francisco.

Adrian Monk: Dad, there it is! There's another runoff!
Jack Monk: Are you okay? You called me Dad.
Adrian Monk: Ah, there goes the case. It's all been erased. I guess your boss is gonna get away with murder.
Jack Monk: You called me Dad.

Ben Glazer: Well, better late than never. Now who is this? Come on now. You know the rule about passengers riding in the cab.
Jack Monk: And you the rule about killing your partner.
Midland Detective: Hello, Ben. Told you we might be back. This is a warrant for your arrest.
Ben Glazer: You've gotta be kidding me. We've gone all through this stuff.
Adrian Monk: You were with your partner, Kenneth Woods, when he was killed. We can prove that.
Ben Glazer: [scoffs] Jack, who the hell is this guy?
Jack Monk: He's my son.
Ben Glazer: I don't believe this. Some orthopedist from Baltimore is accusing me...
Jack Monk: This is another son. Adrian. A homicide detective.
Adrian Monk: Ex-detective. I hope to be reinstated soon.
Jack Monk: You didn't apply yet?
Adrian Monk: Dad, I'm fine, all right.
Jack Monk: You want me to make a call?
Adrian Monk: Okay, look, I can take care of myself.

Midland Detective: You were in this truck, this particular truck, the day Kenneth disappeared. We saw the sign-out sheet.
Ben Glazer: That's right. I borrowed it, and I went fishing. Now can you prove that I didn't? Because if you're talking about the GPS system, that thing's already been erased. It's only got a 5,000-mile memory, hmm?
Adrian Monk: We don't need a GPS system to prove anything.
Jack Monk: There was this loud noise like a...
Adrian Monk: Yeah, it was like a rattle.
Jack Monk: Rattle.
Adrian Monk: Flutter.
Jack Monk: Flutter driving us crazy. We figured, it's gotta be a fan belt.
Adrian Monk: It wasn't a fan belt.
Midland Detective: Mr. Glaser, can you explain how part of the victim's necktie was found in a vehicle you were driving?

Jack Monk: Merry Christmas!
Adrian Monk: I- I didn't get you anything.
Jack Monk: Oh, yes, you did. Here, it's all yours. I'll be right with you. Your first bike. Get on. I'll be holding you. Go ahead. Don't be afraid. That's it. Now I got you.
Adrian Monk: Don't let go.
Jack Monk: So there's nothing to be afraid of. Are you ready, sir? Okay, start pedaling. Let's go. Slowly.
Adrian Monk: Don't let go.
Jack Monk: I'm not. Okay. Go straight, go straight. That's it. Make a turn now. To the left. Easy, easy. Easy. That's it. Pedal a little faster. Oh, you're doing great. You got it. You got it. You got it! Look at you! That's it, like you've been doing it all these years.
Adrian Monk: Dad, can I get some mud flaps?
Jack Monk: Come on. Yes, you can. That's my boy! Come on. Big circle. Big circle. Keep your eye on the road. I'm with you. That's it. Pedal harder. Keep pedaling. Go straight. Straight, straight. Go ahead, go ahead.
Adrian Monk: Hey, Dad, watch this.
Jack Monk: Go ahead. That's my boy. Come back. Come towards me. The finish line. Will he make it? Yes! Let me hear the bell. That a boy.