Lieutenant Disher: There's more.
Captain Stottlemeyer: And would you like to share it with us, Randy?
Lieutenant Disher: The shooter abandoned the car in a parking lot. There was a security camera. We got a picture of him.
Captain Stottlemeyer: That's it? They can't clean that up?
Lieutenant Disher: It is cleaned up. I mean, he was 50 feet away. Should I release it to the press?
Captain Stottlemeyer: What's the point? I've seen better pictures of Bigfoot.

Dr. Kroger: Okay. Well, I hate to end the session on that note, but the hour is up.
Adrian Monk: No, it's not. It's only been 57 minutes.
Dr. Kroger: How'd you do that? You're wearing a watch?
Adrian Monk: No.
Dr. Kroger: You could see my watch, right?
Adrian Monk: No. It's a gift.
Dr. Kroger: And a curse.
Adrian Monk: And a curse.

Sharona: Adrian. Adrian, you were right. This is the room. Look at the drapes and the church outside. They both must have taken this class.
Adrian Monk: Oh, yes. Oh, no! Okay. Sharona, I can't do this.
Sharona: Why? 'Cause he's naked? You've never seen a naked man before?
Adrian Monk: No.
Sharona: Well, you've seen yourself naked, right?
Adrian Monk: Just once.

Adrian Monk: That's it. Sharona, let's go. Come on. I can't. I just can't.
Sharona: What about the case?
Adrian Monk: Forget about the case. We can't win 'em all.
Sharona: So you're gonna let a murderer go because you can't talk to a naked man?
Adrian Monk: Yes.

Adrian Monk: That's it. We can see ourselves out. Just stay there.
Sharona: What is your problem? The human body is a beautiful thing.
Adrian Monk: No. It's not.

Sharona: Thank you, Adrian. I thought I'd thank you now, 'cause in a half an hour, you're probably gonna piss me off again.
Adrian Monk: You're welcome.

Lyle Turrow: Excuse me. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! What are you doing?
Adrian Monk: There was a bit of a smudge, like an ink stain. I think I got most of it.
Lyle Turrow: No, no, no. It's an autograph.
Adrian Monk: Oh?
Lyle Turrow: Yeah. It's a 1988 All-Star game ball signed by Michael Jordan.
Adrian Monk: [looks at wipe] Well, maybe he could sign it again.
Lyle Turrow: Sure. I'll just call Michael, ask him to stop by.
Adrian Monk: Thank God. I'm so relieved.
Sharona: He's being sarcastic. Give it to me.

Adrian Monk: Hey! The numbers are crooked! Somebody fix the scoreboard! No wonder attendance is down.

Sharona: Oh, my God. I can't watch. Adrian, tell me what's happening.
Adrian Monk: The three is crooked.
Sharona: What three?
Adrian Monk: On the scoreboard. Why doesn't he fix it?
Sharona: Adrian, I need you to watch the game. How's he doing?
Adrian Monk: The one is upside down.
Sharona: You can't tell the one is upside down.
Adrian Monk: I can tell. The whole scoreboard, it's like some surreal, abstract art thing.

Sharona: Adrian, why don't you go talk to him?
Adrian Monk: Me?
Sharona: Yeah. Give him a pep talk. He respects you.
Adrian Monk: He does? Why?
Sharona: 'Cause he doesn't work for you.