Foreman: What the hell you think you're doing? I don't know if you heard the news, buddy, we gotta tear this whole place down.
Adrian Monk: You can't do that.
Foreman: I can't do that? I got two bulldozers outside says I can.
Adrian Monk: I'm not leaving!
Foreman: All right, pal, look. I don't know what your story is, all right? But you're going home. Where's the key to the lock? Give it to me. [Monk throws it down a drain] You gotta be kidding me. Cheese and crackers, we're tearing down a parking garage here. All right, this is a good thing. All right, we're gonna build a playground here for the kids. What's the matter, you don't like kids?
Adrian Monk: My wife died here. Right over there. Her name was Trudy. She died here. You can't tear it down.

Eileen Hill: All right everybody, let's just calm down, okay? Let's just settle down, all right? Hi. Hello, Adrian. I'm Eileen Hill. I'm on the City Council. This parking garage is slated for demolition. We voted on it last week.
Adrian Monk: I know. I was there.
Foreman: Why can't we just drag this bozo out of here?
Eileen Hill: Excuse me, do you know who this man is? This is Adrian Monk. He was a decorated police officer, who's been serving this city officially and unofficially for 20 years.
Foreman: Well, he sure isn't serving the city today.
Eileen Hill: Adrian, I understand you lost your wife here. Where did it happen?
Adrian Monk: It was right- It was right over there.
Eileen Hill: I'm so sorry for your loss. I really am. But you can appreciate our situation. There are hundreds of children in this community.
Adrian Monk: Councilwoman, this is a crime scene. This is hallowed ground. Trudy's case is still open. There could still be clues here. Something I missed. If you tear this place down, they'll be gone forever.
Eileen Hill: I didn't consider that.
Adrian Monk: You could be letting a killer go free for a swing set or a sandbox.

Lieutenant Disher: Okay, well, they were tourists. Probably German.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Really? Why do you say that?
Lieutenant Disher: Because they were German. Uh, from Berlin. Mr. and Mrs. Erhard Helmrich. Uh, we found their wallets and passports in their pockets. I, uh, talked to a clerk at a hotel. They were staying downtown at the Best Western. He said that they were a pretty quiet couple.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Yeah, they look pretty quiet.
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, well, they weren't this quiet. I mean, before last night. They were just regular quiet, like, when they checked in to the hotel.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Yeah, Randy, I know what you mean. I was trying to be wry.
Lieutenant Disher: Oh, sorry, my bad. Do you want to say it again?

Harold Krenshaw: I heard about your little temper-tantrum downtown.
Natalie: It wasn't a temper-tantrum.
Harold Krenshaw: Mm-hmm. Whatever it was, it apparently worked. I have today's agenda here, and it looks like we'll be voting on your parking garage again.
Adrian Monk: That's right.
Harold Krenshaw: You know, I voted against you last time.
Adrian Monk: Yes, yes, I know that.
Harold Krenshaw: But I've been thinking about it, and I could be persuaded to change my mind.
Adrian Monk: Really?
Harold Krenshaw: Oh, yes.
Adrian Monk: Fascinating.
Harold Krenshaw: How shall I vote? Aye or nay? Up or down? Hmm, I don't know. It all depends on my mood. And my mood depends on how I feel.
Adrian Monk: What does that mean? Your mood depends on how you feel?
Harold Krenshaw: You know what it means.
Adrian Monk: I really, really don't. Do you have any idea what he is talking about? I'm lost.

Adrian Monk: Here's the thing. Uh, I'm conducting my own investigation. It's kind of personal. I need to speak with the councilwoman. There's a vote that's very important to me, and they've just postponed it until next week. [phone rings]
Natalie: When was the last time you saw Ms. Hill?
Maria Schecter: Yesterday morning. She same in for about an hour. And then she had to leave. She had an appointment.
Adrian Monk: Great. With whom?
Maria Schecter: I don't know. I'd have to check her calendar. [waits]
Adrian Monk: Could you do that, please?
Maria Schecter: I don't like you.

Maria Schecter: There it is. That's her schedule for the whole week.
Natalie: Oh, great, can you print that out for us, please?
Maria Schecter: How am I supposed to get you a copy?
Natalie: There's a printer right behind you.
Maria Schecter: Yeah, there's no print button.
Natalie: Yeah, it's right here. It says "P-N-T."
Maria Schecter: Pint?
Adrian Monk: It's abbreviated. Print, printing, printer. Print.
Maria Schecter: I'm new here.
Adrian Monk: Really? I never would have guessed that.
Maria Schecter: Are you patronizing me?
Adrian Monk: No, I'm insulting you.
Maria Schecter: [paper falls on floor] Great. Thank God it's Friday.
Adrian Monk: Take your time.
Maria Schecter: I hope my water doesn't break. Chivalry is dead. I don't like you at all.

Captain Stottlemeyer: Good morning. I'm Captain Leland Stottlemeyer. This is Lieutenant Disher. You know Adrian Monk, Natalie Teeger.
Lieutenant Disher: You're a hard man to find, Mr. Crawford. We were leaving messages at your house.
Paul Crawford: My apologies, Lieutenant. I was out all night. Working on a series of articles about police corruption. They're confidential, hush-hush. You understand.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Yeah, I look forward to not reading that.

George Gionopolis: Hey! Can I help you?
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, are you Mr. Gianopolous?
George Gionopolis: You health inspectors?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Homicide.
George Gionopolis: Oh, hey! It's okay, they're only from homicide! You scared the bejeezus out of me.
Lieutenant Disher: Are you the, uh, hot dog czar?
George Gionopolis: My father was Frankie Gianopolous. And he was the original czar. And I was the... The duke of dogs. And then, when he passed away-- [clutches chest] Oh. Hold on.
Natalie: Oh, my God, are you okay?
George Gionopolis: [wheezes] No. No, I'm fine. Oh, boy, I'm fine. Oh, that happens to me three or four times a week. My doctor can't figure it out. [continues eating hotdog]
Adrian Monk: Really? His doctor can't figure it out.

George Gionopolis: Anyway, when my old man passed, I inherited his kingdom, so to speak.
Al: You hungry?
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, yeah, sure, I'll take one. I love hot dogs.
George Gionopolis: Oh, yeah, yeah, take all you want. We take care of our friends in blue, and they take care of us.
Lieutenant Disher: Mmm. Boy, that's good. What is that, beef or pork?
George Gionopolis: Uh, we use "meat."
Natalie: Why do you say it like that?
George Gionopolis: Uh, we are required by law to put it in quotes.

Adrian Monk: Yeah. Mr. Dog. Mr. Dog czar, we're looking for councilwoman Eileen Hill. She's been missing for two days.
George Gionopolis: I heard about that. It was on the news. I can't help you.
Captain Stottlemeyer: When was the last time you saw her?
George Gionopolis: Oh, it was, like, three weeks ago. A month, uh... [coughs into a bag of hotdogs] No, they're good. Uh, she did call me on Monday morning and said she was coming over, but she never showed up. Which was fine with me. [chuckles]
Natalie: You don't like her?
George Gionopolis: Oh, I wouldn't say that. I would say I hate her. Hate. And every vendor here feels exactly the same way. She wants to regulate us to death.
Al: She wants us to wear gloves. And to put lids on the condiment trays.
George Gionopolis: Lids!
Al: And to change the water in the pots every other day.
Natalie: And what's wrong with that?
George Gionopolis: These dogs are like a fine wine. They need to simmer.
Al: The simmering. That's the secret.
Adrian Monk: Yeah, the simmering. See, the "meat" has to simmer.