Adrian Monk: Just come in! The door's open. [screams as vacuum covers him in dust] Natalie! Natalie! Natalie!
Sharona: Adrian? What happened?
Adrian Monk: Well, it just blew up in my face! Call 911.
Sharona: No, no, no. We don't have to call 911. Just come with me.
Adrian Monk: Oh, I can't see. It's a code red, Natalie.
Sharona: I don't know what code red means.
Adrian Monk: Code red! We talked about this. We had practice drills.
Sharona: Okay, just- You're gonna be fine. Just splash some water on your face. Splash it on your eyes.
[After Monk splashes water on his eyes and finally sees Sharona, he tries cleaning out his eyes again]
Sharona: Hello, Adrian.
Adrian Monk: What year is this?

Sharona: I thought at the most they were gonna offer me five to ten grand, but this is real money. This will pay for Benjy's college. Not just community college. Any college. He can go anywheres that he wants.
Natalie: Sharona, that is so great. I mean, congratulations! I'm sorry about the circumstance.
Sharona: Oh, no, no, it's okay. I only met the guy twice. Oh, my God. Is this what good luck feels like? I mean, because I never actually had it, you know?
Adrian Monk: Huh.
Natalie: What? Is there a problem?
Adrian Monk: There's something wrong here.
Sharona: Don't you say that. Don't find anything, because if this is not an accident, then they're not responsible, and then they don't have to pay. Do you understand?
Adrian Monk: Right. Okay...
Sharona: No, I want you to stop looking at this. It was an accident, okay? Say it was an accident. No, I want you to say it was an accident! [sighs] I know that look. I remember that look. I hate that look.

Natalie: But they weren't alone. The caddy was there.
Sharona: The caddy saw the whole thing.
Adrian Monk: That's the beauty of it. It was a perfect plan.
Sharona: I don't understand.
Adrian Monk: I'll tell you later.
Sharona: No, you have to tell me now. Say "Here's what happened."
Adrian Monk: Well, he's right there.
Sharona: Just tell me. Say "Here's what happened."

Natalie: Well, he can't go too far. He can't sleep without his Trudy pillow.
Sharona: Or that special red toothbrush.
Natalie: Or his little flossing kit.
Sharona: Or the sound machine with that fog horn noises.
Natalie: Actually, that one broke. And they discontinued the model.
Sharona: Really? What did you do?
Natalie: I went out and bought an actual fog horn and made my own tape. I'm not kidding. I have an actual fog horn sitting in my garage.

Sharona: "So, Sharona, how are you doing? What have you been up to?" Well, thank you very much for asking. I am still in Jersey. And I'm nursing again.
Adrian Monk: Really? But isn't Benjy like 17?
Sharona: No, I'm working as a nurse.
Adrian Monk: Oh, that's different.

Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, but, Sharona, you got to admit, if Monk thinks your uncle's running some kind of a scam, he's probably running some kind of scam.
Sharona: Randy, Adrian is not- He's not infallible. He's been wrong before. Remember the ski instructor? Adrian said he was the guy, and it ended up being his twin brother. Do you remember that one?
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, no, he was the guy, remember? There was no brother. He was pretending to be his own twin.
Sharona: Well, I still don't believe it.

Sharona: You still have some schmutz over there.
Adrian Monk: Where?
Sharona: Right there. Hold on, hold on. [hands Adrian a wipe from the drawer]
Adrian Monk: Hey, you still got it.
Sharona: It's like riding a bike.
Adrian Monk: [chuckles] Oh, man.
Sharona: A very clean, very unusual... Very sad bike.

Natalie: Mr. Monk, I think they're over there.
Sharona: You call him Mr. Monk, huh?
Natalie: I know. It's weird. I can't call him by his first name. It's just not me.
Sharona: Adrian, do you mind if she calls you Adrian?
Adrian Monk: Of course not. Why would I mind?
Natalie: Okay, Adrian.
Adrian Monk: Yeah, see, I don't like it.
Natalie: Me either.

Sharona: Adrian, you were right. He's my uncle. I know I only met him twice, but twice is enough. I guess I never... [trips]
Adrian Monk: Sharona.
Natalie: Are you okay?
Sharona: Oh, my God, I think I broke my arm.
Gary Hanks: I can't believe they never fixed that.
Sharona: This is my lucky day. Benjy's going to college. [groans] Oh, God. Oh.

Natalie: So how long are you here for?
Sharona: A day, maybe two.
Adrian Monk: Just a day! Maybe two.
Sharona: You know, I'm gonna need some lawyers, 'cause my uncle Howie died.
Natalie: Oh, I'm so sorry.
Sharona: Yeah, well, you know, I wasn't very close to him, and I didn't really know him that well. But, you know, I was the only family he had. So that's why I'm here.
Natalie: So you're here to claim the body?
Sharona: No, he's already been cremated. He died on the Eastdale Country Club. Have you ever been there?
Natalie: Me? No, I couldn't afford to park my car there. Not on my salary.
Sharona: Oh, yes. I'm sorry, I forgot. You work for Ebenezer Monk. [both laugh]
Adrian Monk: Ha, that's right. That's good. Trouble ahead.