Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk and the Man Who Shot Santa Claus
Brandy Barber: We've all heard Mr. Kenworthy's side of the story. He rented a Santa costume and was on that roof trying to give toys away in the true spirit of Christmas. Adrian Monk: Merry Christmas. Brandy Barber: You can stop saying that now. Mr. Kenworthy said you went up to that roof and just started shooting. Adrian Monk: That's not what happened. Brandy Barber: Why don't you tell us your side of the story? Adrian Monk: Thank you. Well, first off, I want to say to any children watching, I did not shoot Santa Claus. That man, was not Santa Claus. There's no such thing as Santa Claus. [elsewhere, watching on TV:] Captain Stottlemeyer: No, that can't be good. [to a crestfallen Disher] You knew that, right?