Jack Monk, Jr.: Wait. What are you doin'? Adrian, what are you doin'? No, no, no what is it with you and the phone? Come on, you're treating me like another schlub. This is family! Hey, this is family talkin' here. That's gotta mean something.
Adrian Monk: Not to me.
Jack Monk, Jr.: No! Okay, okay! You win. I'll go back to jail. Straight up, I'll do my time. Just do me one favor. Let me call my mother.
Adrian Monk: Your mother.
Jack Monk, Jr.: Yes, Adrian. I have a mother too. Her name is Darlene Monk. She lives in Amarillo, Texas. I'm sure she's been watching the news, and she must be scared to death, okay? Come on. Just one phone call. For old time's sake?
Adrian Monk: We don't have any old times.
Jack Monk, Jr.: Sure, we do. Come on, remember? Remember in the hallway, when you hit me over the head with that metal box?
Adrian Monk: That was a half hour ago.
Jack Monk, Jr.: Yeah, well, it's something. I mean, it's a start.