Jack Monk, Jr.: Do you have any other kind of mayo?
Adrian Monk: What are you doing?
Jack Monk, Jr.: I'm making a sandwich. I'm starving.
Adrian Monk: Are you ever gonna tell me what happened?
Jack Monk, Jr.: After I eat, okay? I have been running all night. That's mine.
Adrian Monk: Talk first. Then eat. Look, I can do both. All right? There's not much to tell. It took me two months and 87 spoons to get outta there.
Jack Monk, Jr.: What about your cellmate?
Adrian Monk: I didn't have one. Made life a lot easier. So last night after lights out, I made my move. So three minutes later, I was in the sewer pipe.
Adrian Monk: Yeah, okay. You can skip that part.
Jack Monk, Jr.: The stench was god-awful. It was like crawling through someone's-
Adrian Monk: Okay, it's okay. Just skip ahead.
Jack Monk, Jr.: Okay, about 3:00AM, I come out the other side, and I saw a car. Looked empty. I figured I got lucky. I thought maybe I could hotwire it. I yank open the door, and there she was. I tried calling 911, but then some guard in the tower spots me, opened fire, and I just... I just took off and never looked back.
Adrian Monk: So let me see if I understand this. If you're telling the truth...
Jack Monk, Jr.: Hand to God.
Adrian Monk: Right. Hand to God. This is your story. A homicidal maniac happened to be strolling by the federal prison. He saw the car. He stabs the driver. But he doesn't steal the car. He just runs away. Couple minutes later, Jack Monk, Jr. Crawls out of a manhole a few yards away and finds the body?
Jack Monk, Jr.: Yes.
Adrian Monk: Thank you. You made this very easy for me.