Ambrose Monk Quotes Page 1 of 4

Quote from Mr. Monk and the Three Pies

Sharona: Did you call the police?
Ambrose Monk: Oh, no. They... They no longer respond to my complaints because I call them more often than I should. I'd like to complain to them about it, but they no longer respond to my complaints.

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Quote from Mr. Monk and the Three Pies

Ambrose Monk: That's easy for you to say. You've always been the fearless one.
Adrian Monk: Here it comes.
Ambrose Monk: You should have seen him. Going into stores and buying things, all by himself when he was 15.
Sharona: Wow.
Ambrose Monk: Driving a car when he was 24. Going out on dates... Going out on dates with women at 26 years of age.
Sharona: He's a regular Evel Knievel.

Quote from Mr. Monk Goes Home Again

Ambrose Monk: Okay. Are you and Natalie...
Adrian Monk: What?
Ambrose Monk: Involved?
Adrian Monk: What? No. No. No. No. Why, why would you even ask me that?
Ambrose Monk: Well, it's been eight years since Trudy.
Adrian Monk: Exactly! It's only been eight years.
Ambrose Monk: You're a widower. She's a widow. And I know how you are with the ladies. I remember, in high school, those girls calling you on the phone, talking to you on the phone, complimenting you, huh?
Adrian Monk: Ambrose. Ambrose, those were my teachers.
Ambrose Monk: So? What about Mrs. Flagan? Yeah?

Quote from Mr. Monk's 100th Case

James Novak: [v.o.] Then, in a flash, she was gone. Two weeks before Christmas, 1997, Trudy Monk was downtown running some errands. She returned to her car in a parking garage on Somerset Avenue.
Newscaster: Our top story tonight, the wife of a highly decorated San Francisco detective was killed this morning, the victim of an apparent car bombing. Trudy Monk, a 35-year-old freelance journalist died a short time later at Saint Jude's Hospital. Her husband, Adrian Monk, was by her side. The police are pursuing several leads but have made no arrests.
James Novak: The case is still open. It has been Adrian Monk's obsession for 11 years.
Ambrose Monk: After the hospital, he came back. Back home. He just sat in that chair all night. I could see his soul leaving his body. Adrian died too. The bomb was across town, but it killed my brother too.

Quote from Mr. Monk and the Three Pies

Adrian Monk: So, anyway, Ambrose. What am l... What am I doing here?
Ambrose Monk: Believe it or not, I need your help. Something happened two nights ago. It's my next-door neighbor. His name is Pat Van Ranken.
Sharona: What happened?
Ambrose Monk: I'm 85% to 90% sure he killed his wife.

Quote from Mr. Monk and the Three Pies

Ambrose Monk: Ah! Ah! Here it is. Here it is. Right here. Here.
Sharona: The carjacking?
Adrian Monk: Oh, my God. We were there, remember?
Sharona: Yeah, I know.
Ambrose Monk: Doesn't that label say "cherry pie"?
Sharona: Yes, it does. It says "cherry pie." How did you remember that?
Ambrose Monk: It's a gift... and a curse.

Quote from Mr. Monk and the Three Pies

Adrian Monk: This is my assistant, Sharona.
Sharona: Oh, hi.
Ambrose Monk: Hello. We spoke on the phone.
Adrian Monk: Oh, so, you can dial a telephone. I was worried. I thought you might be paralyzed or something.
Ambrose Monk: I wasn't paralyzed.
Adrian Monk: I was being sarcastic.
Ambrose Monk: You were being sardonic. Sarcasm is a contemptuous, ironic statement. You were being mockingly derisive. That's sardonic. Please, come in.

Quote from Mr. Monk and the Three Pies

Sharona: Hey. Did you write this?
Ambrose Monk: Yes.
Sharona: I have this answering machine. This is a very good manual. All the steps are very clear.
Ambrose Monk: I'm sure you noticed the typo.
Sharona: Uh, no.
Ambrose Monk: It's on page 42. [speaks German] It should read... [speaks German]
Sharona: You wrote the German part too?
Adrian Monk: Ambrose can speak seven languages.
Ambrose Monk: Seven and a half. I'm teaching myself Mandarin.
Adrian Monk: That'll come in handy.

Quote from Mr. Monk and the Three Pies

Ambrose Monk: He was parked by the southern entrance.
Sharona: How do you know that?
Ambrose Monk: It's obvious. Why don't you tell her, Adrian?
Adrian Monk: Uh...
Ambrose Monk: The yellow acorns on his truck, which can only mean he was parked under a spotted oak tree.
Sharona: Wow.
Ambrose Monk: Which are found?
Adrian Monk: Uh...
Ambrose Monk: Near water.
Sharona: Wow.
Ambrose Monk: So that's near the river by the southern entrance.
Sharona: Wow.
Ambrose Monk: Please stop saying "Wow."
Ambrose Monk: This detective stuff is easy.
Sharona: Looks like you got a new partner.
Adrian Monk: Yeah, for any crime committed within 30 feet of this property.

Quote from Mr. Monk and the Three Pies

Adrian Monk: Come on. He's heading downtown.
Sharona: Ambrose, come with us.
Ambrose Monk: Me? No, no, no.
Sharona: You're just gonna hide in this house for the rest of your life?
Ambrose Monk: That's my plan, yes.

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