‘Won't You Be Our Neighbor’
Season 6, Episode 5 - Aired October 22, 2014
With Phil in charge of selling the house next door, Claire is hopeful they can select the perfect neighbors. Jay forbids Manny from seeing his new girlfriend after learning she's the grand daughter of his great closet rival. Meanwhile, Mitchell and Cameron are determined to get Lily moved to another class to get away from a stern, uncompromising teacher.
Quote from Cameron
Cameron: [clears throat] Excuse me, Ms. Crank. Plank. Ms. Plank?
Mrs. Plank: Yes?
Mitchell: Hi. I sa- Oh. A frowny-face stamp. I didn't know they made those.
Mrs. Plank: I had to special order it from Germany. May I help you?
Quote from Jay
Jay: This place is a great idea, Gloria. Did I ever tell you this is where I first tried pretzel bread?
Quote from Phil
George: So, this has been fun. It'll be even more fun when you guys move in.
Lisa: Well, even if we raise our offer, who knows if we'll get the house?
Claire: Fortunately, you are getting into bed with the right people.
Phil: Nothing inappropriate, of course.
Claire: Wink, wink.
Phil: But just so there's no misunderstanding, we want you.
Quote from Haley
Phil: Why didn't you stop us?
Haley: Hey, I don't know what you guys are into.
Claire: Oh, my God. What are we gonna do?
Haley: Oh, relax. I'm sure you guys will find a couple that wants to get with you.
Quote from Jay
Jay: You're the one that owes the apology to me.
Earl: Oh, yeah? Closetcon, 1998. You sabotaged my booth.
Jay: That thing collapsed because it was cheap and bought in the orient. Like your wife.
Quote from Jay
Earl: This is the big stud who's been groping my Sophie?
Manny: Sir, I promise you there's nothing untoward between me and Sophie.
Earl: [chuckles] You know what, kid? I believe you.
Gloria: And you should. He's the sweetest boy in the whole world!
Jay: No, he's not!
Earl: Pritchett, I wish I had a number-10 mirror so you could see the look on your face right now. Hey, this is nice. I think I am gonna call it the "sock 'n' roll."
Jay: The hell you are. ... Damn! That's a good name.