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Stuck in a Moment

‘Stuck in a Moment’

Season 10, Episode 10 - Aired December 12, 2018

As Haley searches for the right time to break the news to her family that she's pregnant, Alex feels the burden of keeping the secret from her parents. Claire steals Christmas back after Phil borrows the decorations for an open house. Meanwhile, Jay and Gloria deal with an infestation at home, and Mitchell and Cameron have a few Christmas missteps as they take care of Cal.

Quote from Jay

Jay: Stop! He wasn't bitten. He bumped his head when he went back in the house to grab my medication.
Gloria: What medication?
Claire: Oh, my God, Dad, are you okay?
Phil: We're gonna get through this, buddy.
Jay: It's an elbow cream that I secretly use every night after Gloria falls asleep.
Gloria: You sent our son into the nest of a deadly spider for a beauty cream?
Jay: It's a medicine that treats the heartbreaking condition of dry elbow! It requires a veterinarian's prescription because it's primarily used on rhinos and elephants. [all chuckling] I see on our march to become a perfect society, elbow shaming is still allowed.


Quote from Manny

Dylan: Can somebody save my life?
Jay: Oh, Cam, grab a foot.
Cameron: Yep.
Jay: God, he's really wedged in there.
Manny: Ah, if only we had some kind of award-winning, placenta-based lubricant.

Quote from Haley

Dylan: Merry Christmas Eve, Alex.
Alex: So, he's still alive... Must mean you haven't told Mom you're pregnant yet.
Haley: We want to be careful to do it right.
Alex: Now you're being careful? I can't keep this secret anymore. Look at me!
Haley: [gasps]
Dylan: Ugh. She's going gray.
Haley: Oh my God, she is! I was just gasping at the haircut.

Quote from Dylan

Haley: Well, we're telling them today, okay? That way, if Mom freaks, she'll have 10 days in Bermuda to calm down.
Alex: Okay, then go now! She's never in a better mood than on Christmas Eve.
Dylan: Wait, is this a good way to tell her? We hang a stocking for "Grandma Claire," and when she goes, "I'm not a grandma," we go, "Tell that to Haley and my's baby."
Alex: Promise me you won't home school this kid.

Quote from Alex

Haley: Hey, Mom. What are you doing?
Claire: Ugh, Christmas cards are just clutter.
Alex: Wait, wait, wait, wait. You can't throw away Uncle Cam's card. You know how sensitive he gets about his piano placement.
Luke: Remember that one year where his card was slightly behind the one from our old babysitter?
Alex: Mm, I believe he spoke the charming phrase, "And who is this whore?"

Quote from Claire

Dylan: Check out the sledding polar bear paper. Can't look at that and not be in a good mood, huh?
Haley: Yeah.
Claire: I am so sick of that stuff. I ordered five rolls from some kid for a school drive. He shows up with fifty... his fault. Kid bursts into tears. Like it's on me that he can't count?
Luke: I was six, Mom.
Claire: Mm.

Quote from Phil

Phil: Bermuda just gets it. Formal yet casual.
Claire: And home of the most perfectly tanned lower thigh, upper knee region in the world.
Phil: It's not hard to pick out a Bermudan in a locker room.

Quote from Phil

Claire: Wait. Well, this can't be right. This itinerary says we're on four flights with three layovers.
Phil: Oh, yeah, um... Remember how I found that amazing airline deal online?
Claire: Yeah, but two of these layovers are six hours each.
Phil: Yes, but the third one's only minutes.
Claire: But it's at O'Hare. Honey, we'll have to sprint from one end of the airport to the other.
Phil: It'll all be worth it when we wake up on December 27th in Bermuda, where the forecast predicts... hot fog.

Quote from Phil

Claire: Wait, hang on. Don't leave. Don't leave. What is Economy Minus?
Phil: A plus, actually, since no one's jealous of people with aisle seats, because it's basically two innovative eighteen-person benches facing each other.

Quote from Joe

Gloria: Who moved Cam's card? He's gonna be very upset if he's not on the mantel!
Manny: I put it in a drawer until he gets here. That glitter was getting on everything.
Joe: I breathed some of that in. I cough gold now.

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