‘Stand By Your Man’
Season 10, Episode 18 - Aired March 20, 2019
Phil tries to be a male role model to Luke, Dylan and Bill and pass on some of his experience. After Mitchell forgets his wedding anniversary, he tries to make it up to Cameron by joining him at his favorite cowboy bar. Meanwhile, Jay tries to sell his dog beds on a TV shopping channel.
Quote from Phil
Claire: So, who's the top card on the fight tonight?
Phil: I'm gonna say a Latin guy... and a Russian.
Quote from Jay
Jay: [answering phone] Hello. Speaking. Yes, of course I'll hold. Gloria, it's CalShopTV. I think they're gonna give me a slot to sell my dog beds.
Gloria: CalShopTV? The Southland's premier shopping network? I watch it all the time. And so do all my friends.
Jay: This is big time, Gloria. People buy all sorts of crap on there. Hey, I'll finally get to use my spray-on hair!
Quote from Phil
Phil: Boys' night! Unlike in high school and most of college, by choice.
Quote from Luke
Bill: Where's the opener?
Phil: You don't need an opener. Hand it over. Let me show you how it used to be done. Oh, dear God. No one tell Claire I did that.
Luke: You know my friend Corey who comes over here and broke that lamp? There is no Corey. We'll blame it on him.
Quote from Phil
Phil: Come on, let's not make Dylan compete with bird's nest. It's fight time, gents, courtesy of Big Daddy Dunphy! No need for each of you to Venmo me $19. I got this. Things are, uh... Things are going well.
Quote from Phil
Luke: Dad, you didn't buy MMA. You bought "Mamma Mia."
Phil: Why would I buy "Mamma Mia"? I've seen it, like, three ti...
Quote from Phil
Phil: [on the phone] Representative. [slowly] Representative. Dunphy. Dun-phy. Dun... No. No, no, no. I'm not done. I'm not done! Come on! [quietly] Somewhat satisfied.
Quote from Phil
Phil: [aside to camera] I couldn't get through to the cable company. I had to think fast. These guys were here to watch a fight, so I decided to show them the most epic battle of all time.
Quote from Phil
Bill: See? The old dude has no idea what he's talking about.
Phil: Stop calling him the old dude. He's my age! And he's just trying to shape a young mind!
Quote from Claire
Claire: [aside to camera] I'm afraid of Lily. W... I know that sounds horrible. What I mean to say is that lately I am unnerved by the way she'll just sit there, quietly staring, judging me. So, to put it in kinder terms, I'm afraid of Lily.