Modern Family - Cameron Quote #1059
Gloria: It's a bad time, Cam. Turns out, it wasn't the allergies. I feel terrible. You shouldn't be close to me. I don't want to get you sick.
Cameron: Oh, gosh. No danger of that. I have the immune system of a horse. When I was a kid, I needed a transfusion, and there was a mix-up with the vials. I've contacted Marvel Comics repeatedly, but they don't seem interested.
Quote from Phil
Claire: So we're running away from home. I mean, i-i- Is that okay?
Phil: Yes. We live with three adults. We're basically landlords in an apartment building. We're the Ropers!
Quote from Jay
Jay: You said Cam wouldn't let you come. I thought it was safe.
Mitchell: Safe to what, steal my special day?
Jay: Well, you made it sound so good! The pool, the steak, no one to talk to.
Mitchell: Well, now we have someone to talk to. Thanks a lot.
Jay: Look, the place is gigantic. You do your thing, I'll do mine.
Mitchell: Oh, my God. Dad, you even stole the book that I'm reading.
Jay: When you were over at the house, I peeked at the jacket. I'm not gonna read something Larry King called "Crazy good"?
Quote from Mitchell
Joe: I'll fly there.
Gloria: Okay, vamanos!
Jay: Kid loves that cape.
Mitchell: So, I see your stance on sons wearing accessories has evolved.
Jay: The cape gives him superpowers. What did leg warmers give you?
Mitchell: Flair. They gave me flair.
Quote from Send Out the Clowns
Cameron: [aside to camera] This week, the world lost a great man, and I lost a mentor. For nearly 60 years, Professor Ringmaster Al Uzielli helped young hopefuls like me find their clown persona.
Mitchell: "Professor Ringmaster"?
Cameron: It's a very prestigious title at Clown College. One step below Piemaster General.
Quote from Unplugged
Cameron: [affected accent] The tribe elders foretold that though I lay with fire-haired man, the giving hawk would bring us baby with her skin the color of sweet corn, which my people call maize.
Mitchell: Okay. Please stop.
Mr. Plympton: Well, uh-
Cameron: Knowledge is her sustenance. Like so much maize which, you'll remember, means corn.
Mitchell: What if I was a single dad?
Quote from Catch of the Day
Mitchell: When did we decide that Lily could go to Disneyland? I thought we were gonna talk about this.
Cameron: She's missing one day of school. I missed half of the fifth grade because of a pig bite, and I'm just as educated as anyone else.
Mitchell: Really? When we met, you thought you grew up in Central America.
Cameron: Missouri is in the center of America.
Mitchell: Okay. You also thought that the cavemen killed the dinosaurs.
Cameron: Were you there?