Cameron Quote #854
Cameron: They've been here 2 days and they've used 18 towels, yet the soap is untouched. What are they, sloughing each other clean like elephants?
More Modern Family Quotes
Quote from Send Out the Clowns
Cameron: [aside to camera] This week, the world lost a great man, and I lost a mentor. For nearly 60 years, Professor Ringmaster Al Uzielli helped young hopefuls like me find their clown persona.
Mitchell: "Professor Ringmaster"?
Cameron: It's a very prestigious title at Clown College. One step below Piemaster General.
Quote from Unplugged
Cameron: [affected accent] The tribe elders foretold that though I lay with fire-haired man, the giving hawk would bring us baby with her skin the color of sweet corn, which my people call maize.
Mitchell: Okay. Please stop.
Mr. Plympton: Well, uh-
Cameron: Knowledge is her sustenance. Like so much maize which, you'll remember, means corn.
Mitchell: What if I was a single dad?
Quote from Alone Time
Gloria: It's a bad time, Cam. Turns out, it wasn't the allergies. I feel terrible. You shouldn't be close to me. I don't want to get you sick.
Cameron: Oh, gosh. No danger of that. I have the immune system of a horse. When I was a kid, I needed a transfusion, and there was a mix-up with the vials. I've contacted Marvel Comics repeatedly, but they don't seem interested.
Quote from Jay
Jay: Nobody gets out of this. World's worst sport, world's worst players of it. Twenty-two girls in a cluster zig-zagging across a field like a busted Roomba. Except the only thing it sucks up is two hours of my life.
Quote from Gloria
Manny: It's a tragedy. No other way to put it.
Jay: Such a beautiful day, too.
Gloria: We just have to accept that Lily has a soccer game and we all have to be there. You were supposed to make an excuse.
Jay: I'm sorry! I ran into Cam at the market. He asked if we could go. I panicked. I shot myself in the foot.
Gloria: Oh, yeah, you shot yourself on your foot, you put your foot in your mouth, you put the shoe in the wrong foot. What is with you Americans and the foot? I hate that painting, by the way.