Luke Quote #258
Quote from Luke in And One to Grow On
Phil: Well, somebody smells good. What perfume is that?
Luke: Every perfume! Twenty of the geekiest girls God ever fouled this planet with and just me dancing with all of them! During the Charleston, my hair got caught in one of their headgear!
Phil: Wow, Charleston on the first day?
Luke: Last day! Just because you're a dancer doesn't mean I have to be one, too, cha cha cha. Damn it! I'm never gonna fall for one of your lies again. Just take me to autopsy camp. [police siren wails]
Phil: Oh, shoot. Am I gonna get a ticket?
Luke: If there's any justice, it'll be a big one, too, three, and four. Damn it!
Modern Family Quotes
‘And One to Grow On’ Quotes
Quote from Claire
Alex: Hey, mom, can you take me driving? My test is coming up, and I really need to practice.
Claire: Oh, honey, I would, but I've got a big closets and blinds union meeting today.
[aside to camera:]
Claire: There is no closets and blinds union. Driving with Alex is torture. She drives so slowly. I have to be the only parent who slams on the imaginary gas.
Quote from Phil
Phil: Hey, honey.
Claire: Oh, you're just in time for breakfast.
Luke: Ooh, we should probably go light on the food. Something tells me we're not gonna want to do this on a full stomach. I can't believe there's such a thing as autopsy camp.
[aside to camera:]
Phil: There is no such thing as autopsy camp. I had to trick Luke 'cause I'm actually taking him to a ballroom-dance class. He's been resisting, but it's in his blood. I come from a long line of dancing Dunphys -- a kick line, actually.
Quote from Claire
Haley: Hey, I'm not doing anything. I guess I could take her.
Alex: Great! I'll go check the tire pressure and the fluid levels!
Haley: Fun! Can't wait! Be out in a sec! [to Claire] Okay, my rate just went up.
Claire: All right, but this buys your time and your silence. Alex can never know how much I hate driving with her. [horn honks] Mm, she's in a hurry today.
Haley: Oh, that's just step one of her nine-point safety test. Step two is checking the horn to make sure checking the horn didn't break the horn. [horn honks]
Claire: She should never drive.